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Hospice nurse explains why we shouldn't be afraid to die

<p>A hospice nurse has shared why we shouldn't be afraid to die, explaining all the ways in which our bodies "shut off" to make for a "peaceful" death. </p> <p>Julie McFadden, a nurse based in Los Angeles, has long been sharing videos and explanations about end of life care in an attempt to destigmatise the conversations and fear around death and dying. </p> <p>In her latest YouTube video, McFadden got candid with her followers as she confessed she isn't afraid to die and why no one else should be either.</p> <p>She went on to explain all the ways in which our bodies are supposed to "shut off" in our final moments, making for a "peaceful" and "natural" death. "</p> <p>"I'm not afraid of death and here's the science behind it, our body biologically helps us die, so here is what I've seen and learned as a hospice nurse over the years - our body is literally built to die," she said.</p> <p>The hospice nurse revealed that bodies began to slowly shut down in the six months leading up to death, explaining that a person nearing the end of their life would start "eating less, drinking less, and sleeping more."</p> <p>"Why is that happening? Because calcium levels in the body are going up and because calcium levels are going up the person is getting sleepier," Julie said.</p> <p>"Our brains have built in mechanisms to make us hungry and thirsty. Biologically, when the body knows it's getting towards the end of life those mechanisms shut off, so the person does not usually feel hungry and does not usually feel thirsty, which is helping the body slowly shut down."</p> <p><iframe title="YouTube video player" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/CJEkzA0gt6s?si=CIzcf3xchddKtf1D" width="560" height="315" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe></p> <p>She put minds at ease by debunking a common concern, saying that while certain diseases could make death more uncomfortable, dying in itself wasn't painful. </p> <p>"There are times when the disease that the person is experiencing can cause symptoms and it's more difficult because they're dying from a certain disease, but the actual process that the body is going through to help it die is actually helping that person," Julie added.</p> <p>"There have been many times as a hospice nurse that I have watched someone slowly die on hospice and I have not needed to give them any medication because their disease was not causing any symptoms - no pain, no shortness of breath, they were just more tired and weren't eating or drinking." </p> <p>"They still did all of the things any other person on hospice would be doing, like they slowly go unconscious, they slowly stop eating and drinking. I didn't have to give them any medications. They were perfectly comfortable and died a very peaceful death."</p> <p>Julie explained that death was even "comforting" in a way because when you're about to take your last breath, your body released endorphins, making you feel euphoric in your final moments.</p> <p>"The body slowly goes into something called ketosis, which releases endorphins. In that person's body those endorphins dull pain, dull nerves, and they also give that person a euphoric sense, so they feel good," she said.</p> <p>"There are many reasons why I don't fear death. Yes, I have had some pretty crazy spiritual experiences as a hospice nurse that led me to not fear death, but there are also biological, metabolical, and physiological things that happen in the body that truly, truly comforted me."</p> <p>She concluded, "Our bodies are built to die. The less we mess with that, the more peaceful it will be."</p> <p><em>Image credits: YouTube / Instagram </em></p>

Caring

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The surprising reason you shouldn’t bring camouflage clothing on a cruise

<p><strong>Dress codes</strong></p> <p>If you’ve been on a cruise before, then you’re probably aware that dress codes are still a thing. In fact, clothing recommendations are quite common, as some of the best cruise lines have formal nights, dress-to-impress evenings and planned costume or themed cruise events. So rules about what you can and cannot wear aren’t abnormal.</p> <p>As such, packing for a cruise is no easy feat: You’ll need formalwear for nights, pool wear for the day, outfits for excursions and layers for inclement weather. I’m an avid cruise-goer, and there are a number of items I never board a cruise ship without, but there’s also one thing I absolutely never pack for a cruise headed for the Philippines or the Caribbean: camouflage clothing.</p> <p><strong>Why is camouflage clothing inadvisable?</strong></p> <p>It actually has nothing to do with the formality of your wardrobe. Camouflage clothing happens to be illegal to wear in many countries that are popular cruise destinations. According to cruise liner Royal Caribbean, the Philippines, Antigua, Barbados, Grenada, Jamaica, St. Lucia and Trinidad and Tobago are among those that prohibit camouflage.</p> <p>And while camouflage print clothing and accessories, as well as military-style clothing, aren’t technically banned onboard cruises, most cruise companies will simply ask you not to pack them to curb any potential issues at ports.</p> <p><strong>Why is camouflage clothing banned in these countries?</strong></p> <p>In most countries that prohibit camouflage, it’s because the disguising clothing is reserved for military personnel only. And it’s important to be respectful of this camouflage-free rule, which I learned while travelling to Nevis about seven years ago. My friend was stopped by hotel staff who advised her to change out of her camouflaged pants if she planned to leave the property. Not understanding the seemingly odd request without any context or explanation, we asked what would happen if she didn’t comply. Their response? She could get fined or arrested. As you can imagine, those cute camo pants were then stuffed into her suitcase for the remainder of our stay.</p> <p>“It is a concern because of the affiliation with criminal gangs as well as armed forces,” says Lauren Doyle, a travel advisor and president of boutique travel agency The Travel Mechanic. She says that to avoid any confusion and help curb any potential issues in the future, cruise lines simply advise against bringing it onboard.</p> <p>Doyle, who has booked many cruises for customers, says this information is usually found on a cruise line’s website (which is why it’s important to brush up on cruise tips prior to setting sail), and that many cruise lines will include it in their daily newsletter or app if you’re going to any country that prohibits it.</p> <p><strong>What to do if you accidentally pack camouflage clothing</strong></p> <p>If you’ve packed a camo hat, bathing suit, cargo pants or the camouflage backpack you carry, just leave it on the ship, even if you’re unsure of restrictions on what to wear in certain ports of call.</p> <p>Generally, you can wear camo clothing while you’re onboard, just not during excursions or on land. So if you’ve packed it, go ahead and rock your camo print at the breakfast buffet or on the pool deck (as you ponder those big white balls on the cruise deck). And while you could probably technically wear your camo while chilling on your stateroom balcony, if it’s viewable to the country you’re visiting, it may still be considered disrespectful, so we don’t recommend it.</p> <p><strong>What else is prohibited on a cruise ship?</strong></p> <p>There are plenty of things you can’t do on a cruise, but what about things you shouldn’t bring to begin with? There are a few more surprising items Doyle recommends leaving at home. “Small appliances – like hot plates, steamers or irons – are also prohibited, along with electric blankets,” Doyle says. “Also, medical marijuana is not allowed on cruise ships. Drones are not allowed either.”</p> <p>Each cruise line lists prohibited items on their website, along with some exceptions, so be sure to consult their information before you start packing.</p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock</em></p> <p><em>This article originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.com.au/travel/cruising/the-surprising-reason-you-shouldnt-bring-camouflage-clothing-on-a-cruise" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader's Digest</a>. </em></p>

Cruising

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Why you shouldn’t let guilt motivate you to exercise

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/martin-j-turner-489218">Martin J Turner</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/manchester-metropolitan-university-860">Manchester Metropolitan University</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/anthony-miller-679114">Anthony Miller</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/staffordshire-university-1381">Staffordshire University</a></em></p> <p>The hardest part of consistently exercising is finding the motivation to do it. But using the wrong type of motivation for your workouts could militate against you – and could even have consequences for your mental health.</p> <p>Our research, which <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/02640414.2022.2042124">investigated the motivations</a> of 650 frequent exercisers, found that people who believed things like “I am a loser if I do not succeed in things that matter to me” and “I have to be viewed favourably by people that matter to me” were more likely to use self-pressure and wanting to avoid guilt as motivation to exercise.</p> <p>Not only was this group more likely to not want to exercise at all, we also found that those who used guilt and self-pressure as motivation were at greater risk of experiencing poor mental health.</p> <p>The tendency to hold dogmatic beliefs like “I must” or “I have to”, and harmful beliefs about yourself creates a negative and <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/10413200.2018.1446472?casa_token=ObBghnn3ab4AAAAA%3ATpiEvunYBqKbIqI2_kuC5fM2zMvhhYLP72TVplW3Noc4PYhQUaMBkq1pEabaXXid0hwnE3R5kNYvnA">unhealthy approach to exercise</a>.</p> <p>But the darker side of this mindset is that people who held these beliefs reported higher symptoms of anxiety, depression and stress compared with exercisers who didn’t use self-pressure and guilt as motivation.</p> <p>While it’s possible that people already experiencing poor mental health would be more likely to have negative beliefs about themselves, there’s a deeply reciprocal relationship between mental health and how we think and act.</p> <p>Research shows that extreme, rigid, negative ways of thinking are <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26609889/">risk factors for mental health problems</a>. Repeating negative thoughts many times, over many years, can lead to deep self-loathing which can corrode your <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2019-59628-001">mental health</a> and leave you in a continuous state of <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/02640414.2022.2042124">stress and depression</a>. It can also make you even less likely to positively change your thinking and <a href="https://journals.humankinetics.com/view/journals/tsp/8/3/article-p248.xml">exercise habits</a>.</p> <p>On the other hand, our study found that people who reported lower symptoms of depression, anxiety and stress had significantly less extreme, rigid and negative ways of thinking. These participants were less likely to endorse ways of thinking that involved self-demands (“I must”), magnification (“things are awful”), and self-condemnation (“I am a failure”).</p> <p>These exercisers reported using more useful forms of motivation to workout, such as exercising because they loved the activity and recognised the value and importance of exercise as a part of their identity.</p> <p>These findings show us just how important the thoughts you use to motivate your workouts can be, especially when it comes to your mental health.</p> <p>One solution to these ways of thinking is a psychological approach called <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2016.01423/full">rational emotive behaviour therapy</a> (REBT). REBT aims to understand and challenge deeply held beliefs and develop helpful alternatives. This approach may help an exerciser go from “I have to exercise” and “I’d be worthless if I didn’t exercise” to thinking “I really want to exercise, but if I didn’t exercise, I would be disappointed, but I would not be worthless.”</p> <p>Improving a person’s beliefs about exercise can change their motivation from being centred on self-pressure and guilt to seeing the value and potential enjoyment in working out.</p> <p>There are many <a href="https://www.amazon.co.uk/Rational-Practitioner-Performance-Psychologists-Practicing/dp/1032060409">ideas and tools</a> we can apply from REBT even without having to step foot inside a psychologist’s office. So if you find yourself falling into this cycle of self-loathing and losing motivation to exercise, here’s what you can do.</p> <h2>Think critically about your thinking</h2> <p>When you think about exercising, are your thoughts negative, unhelpful and self-pressuring? Be more critical of your thoughts about exercise, and ask yourself whether they make sense – and if they’re helping you.</p> <p>If the answer is no, try to work on adopting thoughts that do make sense and help you achieve your exercise goals, such as seeing exercise as something to enjoy, instead of something you have to do out of guilt. Being able to challenge your own unhelpful beliefs, and learning to harness more helpful ones, can help you <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/pdf/10.1111/sms.12926?casa_token=fbVymZ3SxrAAAAAA:SiNRAlz0Xh11xbeWDUtxjwlP40gDfurptgas5SSHYLtLD9v06uLm8ztlTvi1AnwTSvTReT_u-fdgiJ0h">achieve your goals</a>.</p> <h2>Realise you’re not what you do</h2> <p>As human beings, we’re imperfect. We mess up – but we also do great things. When things don’t go to plan, it’s important to try and accept this. And remember that failing doesn’t mean you’re a failure.</p> <p>Realise that you aren’t <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1469029222001662">defined by your shortcomings</a>. Recognising that failing does not make you a failure may help you better bounce back from times when you fall short of your goals and expectations and keep on track with reaching your goals and finding solutions.</p> <h2>Harness the power of want</h2> <p>You’re far more likely to stick to your exercise goals if you <a href="https://selfdeterminationtheory.org/SDT/documents/1997_RyanFrederickLepesRubioSheldon.pdf">want to do them</a>. Find an activity that offers you something more than just exercise. Perhaps join an exercise group where you can make new friends or rekindle your passion for something you used to do.</p> <p>If you’re only exercising because you believe you have to or to avoid guilt, then you probably won’t stick with it. Nobody likes to be pressured into doing difficult things. Finding an activity you don’t have to force yourself to do may help you move from seeing exercise as something you have to do to something you love to do.</p> <p>Exercise is, of course, important, but guilting yourself into doing it will probably do more harm than good. The best way is by finding things you enjoy, accepting yourself unconditionally if your motivation does wane, and removing “have to” from your thoughts about exercise.<!-- Below is The Conversation's page counter tag. Please DO NOT REMOVE. --><img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/220342/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /><!-- End of code. If you don't see any code above, please get new code from the Advanced tab after you click the republish button. The page counter does not collect any personal data. More info: https://theconversation.com/republishing-guidelines --></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/martin-j-turner-489218">Martin J Turner</a>, Reader in Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/manchester-metropolitan-university-860">Manchester Metropolitan University</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/anthony-miller-679114">Anthony Miller</a>, Senior Lecturer in Sport and Exercise Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/staffordshire-university-1381">Staffordshire University</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-you-shouldnt-let-guilt-motivate-you-to-exercise-220342">original article</a>.</em></p>

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Hello hay fever – why pressing under your nose could stop a sneeze but why you shouldn’t

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/theresa-larkin-952095">Theresa Larkin</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-wollongong-711">University of Wollongong</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/jessica-nealon-1481995">Jessica Nealon</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-wollongong-711">University of Wollongong</a></em></p> <p>If you have <a href="https://theconversation.com/sniffles-sneezing-and-cough-how-to-tell-if-its-a-simple-allergy-rather-than-the-virus-139657">hay fever</a>, you’ve probably been sneezing a lot lately.</p> <p>Sneezing is universal but also quite unique to each of us. It is a protective reflex action outside our conscious control, to remove irritants from inside our nose.</p> <p>The <a href="https://www.healthline.com/health/holding-in-a-sneeze">pressure in the airways</a> during a sneeze is more than 30 times greater than heavy breathing during exercise. Estimates of how fast a sneeze travels range from <a href="https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0059970">5 metres a second</a> to <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19617285/">more than 150 kilometres per hour</a>.</p> <p>You can sometimes stop a sneeze by holding your nose or pressing underneath it. This is related to the <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/medicine-and-dentistry/gate-control-theory">gate control theory of pain</a> and the idea you can change neural responses with external stimulation. But given the velocity of a sneeze, it might not be a good idea to stop it after it has started.</p> <h2>An involuntary reflex</h2> <p>A sneeze is initiated when sensory nerves in our nose are <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1753465809340571?url_ver=Z39.88-2003&amp;rfr_id=ori:rid:crossref.org&amp;rfr_dat=cr_pub%20%200pubmed">stimulated by an irritant</a> such as allergens, viruses, bacteria or even fluid.</p> <p>The sensory nerves then carry this irritant information to the brain.</p> <p>When a threshold amount of irritant signals reach the brain, the <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2077498/">sneeze reflex is triggered</a>. A sneeze first involves a deep intake of breath and a <a href="https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/why-do-we-sneeze/">build-up of pressure inside the airways</a>. This is then followed by <a href="https://www.healthline.com/health/back-pain/back-pain-when-sneezing#sneezing-as-a-cause">contraction of the diaphragm</a> and rib muscles, <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2077498/">reflex closing of the eyes</a> and a strong exhalation.</p> <p>These are the “ah” and the “tchoo” phases of a sneeze.</p> <p>On the exhalation of a sneeze, your tongue is lifted to the roof of your mouth. This <a href="https://www.atsjournals.org/doi/10.1164/rccm.202004-1263PP">closes off the back of the mouth</a> so the air is forced mostly through your nose. The air expelled through the nose flushes out the irritants that caused the sneeze. The “tch” sound of a sneeze is the reflexive touching of the tongue to the roof of your mouth.</p> <h2>The trigeminal nerves</h2> <p>The trigeminal nerves are the <a href="https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/body/21998-cranial-nerves">largest of our 12 pairs of cranial nerves</a> and the largest sensory nerves in the body.</p> <p>The left and right trigeminal nerves carry sensory information from the face to the brain. This includes touch, pain and irritation sensory information from the facial skin and from inside the nose and mouth. Within each trigeminal nerve are thousands of individual nerve branches that each carry a <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/1744806920901890">specific type of sensory information</a>.</p> <h2>Sensory nerves communicate in the spinal cord</h2> <figure class="align-right zoomable"><a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/555217/original/file-20231023-25-1lg691.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=1000&amp;fit=clip"><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/555217/original/file-20231023-25-1lg691.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=237&amp;fit=clip" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/555217/original/file-20231023-25-1lg691.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=600&amp;h=631&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/555217/original/file-20231023-25-1lg691.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=30&amp;auto=format&amp;w=600&amp;h=631&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/555217/original/file-20231023-25-1lg691.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=15&amp;auto=format&amp;w=600&amp;h=631&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/555217/original/file-20231023-25-1lg691.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=754&amp;h=792&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/555217/original/file-20231023-25-1lg691.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=30&amp;auto=format&amp;w=754&amp;h=792&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/555217/original/file-20231023-25-1lg691.png?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=15&amp;auto=format&amp;w=754&amp;h=792&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=3 2262w" alt="drawing of face with nerves labelled" /></a><figcaption><span class="caption">Henry Gray’s anatomical illustration of the trigeminal nerve.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/83/Gray778.png">Gray's Anatomy/Wikimedia Commons</a></span></figcaption></figure> <p>Sensory nerves travel to the brain via the spinal cord. The sensory nerves that carry pain and irritant signals are narrow, whereas those that carry touch information are wider and faster.</p> <p>In the spinal cord, these nerves communicate with each other via interneurons before sending their message to the brain. The interneurons are the “gates” of the <a href="https://www.physio-pedia.com/Gate_Control_Theory_of_Pain#:%7E:text=and%20trigger%20%E2%80%A2-,Introduction,be%20let%20through%20or%20restricted.">gate control theory of pain</a>.</p> <p>A nerve carrying a pain signal tells the interneuron to “open the gate” for the pain signal to reach the brain. But the larger nerves that carry touch information can “close the gate” and block the pain messages getting to the brain.</p> <p>This is why rubbing an injured area can reduce the sensation of pain.</p> <p><a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fphys.2018.01037/full">One study</a> showed stimulating the trigeminal nerves by moving the jaw reduced tooth pain. We can observe this in action when babies instinctively <a href="https://chaimommas.com/2013/11/05/what-to-expect-with-teething-and-tooth-development-chart/">bite on things or pull their ear</a> when they are teething. These actions can stimulate the trigeminal touch nerves and reduce pain signals via the gate control mechanism.</p> <h2>So does putting your finger under your nose stop a sneeze?</h2> <p>There are <a href="https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-stop-sneezing">many suggestions</a> of how to stop a sneeze. These include pulling your ear, putting your tongue to the roof of your mouth or the back of your teeth, touching your nose, or even sticking your finger in your nose.</p> <p>All of these stimulate the trigeminal touch nerves with the goal of telling the interneurons to “close the gate”. This can block the irritant signals from reaching the brain and triggering a sneeze.</p> <h2>But should you stop a sneeze?</h2> <p>What if an irritant in your nose has triggered a sneeze response, but you’re somewhere it might be considered inappropriate to sneeze. Should you stop it?</p> <p>Closing your mouth or nose during a sneeze increases the pressure in the airways <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26914240/">five to 20 times more than a normal sneeze</a>. With no escape, this <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1945892418823147#:%7E:text=The%20high%20Valsalva%20pressure%20generated,to%20all%20people%20who%20sneeze.">pressure has to be transmitted elsewhere</a> and that can damage your eyes, ears or blood vessels. Though the risk is low, brain aneurysm, ruptured throat and collapsed lung have been <a href="https://www.healthline.com/health/holding-in-a-sneeze#can-holding-a-sneeze-kill-you">reported</a>.</p> <p>So it’s probably best to try and prevent the sneeze reflex by treating allergies or addressing irritants. Failing that, embrace your personal sneeze style and <a href="https://theconversation.com/handkerchief-or-tissue-which-ones-better-for-our-health-and-the-planet-213065">sneeze into a tissue</a>. <!-- Below is The Conversation's page counter tag. Please DO NOT REMOVE. --><img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/215265/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /><!-- End of code. If you don't see any code above, please get new code from the Advanced tab after you click the republish button. The page counter does not collect any personal data. More info: https://theconversation.com/republishing-guidelines --></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/theresa-larkin-952095">Theresa Larkin</a>, Associate professor of Medical Sciences, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-wollongong-711">University of Wollongong</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/jessica-nealon-1481995">Jessica Nealon</a>, Lecturer in Medical Sciences (Neuroscience), <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-wollongong-711">University of Wollongong</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/hello-hay-fever-why-pressing-under-your-nose-could-stop-a-sneeze-but-why-you-shouldnt-215265">original article</a>.</em></p>

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“Maybe I shouldn’t have said it”: Kyle lets slip his Idol salary on air

<p>In a surprising turn of events, radio shock jock and KIIS FM star Kyle Sandilands has unintentionally spilled the beans about his substantial salary for the revamped <em>Australian Idol</em> during a recent episode of The Kyle and Jackie O Show.</p> <p>The revelation came during an interview with pop sensation Dean Lewis, where Sandilands, in a candid moment, discussed the financial perks of his television gig.</p> <p>The conversation began innocently enough, with Sandilands expressing his frustrations about the time commitment required for television work. It was then that Lewis, in a light-hearted manner, probed the radio presenter on why he had taken on the role in the first place.</p> <p>Sandilands, initially reluctant to reveal the figures, eventually gave in to the curiosity and admitted, "Listen, it's clearly over a million dollars for three months of work; you'd be a fool not to do it."</p> <p>However, Sandilands quickly followed up his revelation with a note of uncertainty about whether he was allowed to discuss his salary publicly. He admitted, "I don't know how much they're paying the others, so maybe I shouldn't have said it."</p> <p>Lewis responded with astonishment, acknowledging that it was, indeed, a substantial sum. “That is a lot of money," he said. "That’s actually epic.”</p> <p>This salary disclosure comes at a pivotal time for the <em>Australian Idol</em> franchise, as it undergoes significant changes in its judging panel and strives to recapture its former glory. For the series reboot last year, which aired on Channel 7, international music stars Meghan Trainor and Harry Connick Jr. joined the panel, giving it a fresh look. However, they did not return for the 2024 season. In their place, veteran judge Marcia Hines has made a triumphant return to the hot seat, two decades after being part of the original panel when the show debuted in 2003. This time, she joins Sandilands and Amy Shark on the judging panel.</p> <p>The rebooted <em>Australian Idol</em> faced challenges during its initial run, struggling to attain the ratings it had achieved during its heyday. Upon its premiere in January, the show consistently trailed behind its timeslot competitors, <em>Married At First Sight</em> and <em>Australian Survivor</em>.</p> <p>Toward the end of the series, it was attracting an average of approximately 409,000 viewers across the five major metropolitan areas, in stark contrast to the 835,000 viewers for <em>MAFS</em> and 536,000 for <em>Australian Survivor</em>.</p> <p>To make matters more challenging, the winning singer from the show's reboot failed to make a significant impact on the pop charts, further highlighting the hurdles that the revamped <em>Australian Idol </em>faces.</p> <p><em>Images: Australian Idol</em></p>

Money & Banking

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Why you shouldn’t wait to explore incredible Iceland

<p dir="ltr">Iceland, also called the Land of Fire and Ice, is the most peaceful country in the world. It ranks high in social stability, equality, democracy and more. One of the reasons it is so high on the Peace Index is because it is without a standing army - meaning no army, navy or air force.</p> <p dir="ltr">It's got a lot more to offer though as it's home to some of the most remarkable natural landmarks in the world. </p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>1. Jökulsárlón Glacier Lagoon</strong></p> <p dir="ltr">A constantly changing natural wonder located on the edge of Vatnajökull National Park in southeast Iceland, Jökulsárlón Glacier Lagoon is famous for its icebergs that break away from the glacier and float in the lagoon before they drift out to sea.</p> <p dir="ltr">Sculptural mountains make for a majestic backdrop with seals swimming between the icebergs and reindeer roaming around the shores.</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>2. Diamond Beach</strong></p> <p dir="ltr">Just minutes from the lagoon you’ll find Diamond Beach. It features striking black sand and glistens with iceberg fragments drifting ashore. </p> <p dir="ltr">The beach won’t look the same every time you go as new icebergs form once the old ones disappear. A truly unique destination.</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>3. Skógafoss Waterfall</strong></p> <p dir="ltr">With a width of 25 metres and a drop of 60 metres, Skógafoss Waterfall is one of the largest and most elegant waterfalls in Iceland. Its size leads to a lot of spray, often showcasing single or double rainbows on sunny days. </p> <p dir="ltr"> You can get up close to it by following the river below or taking the stairs next to it to get a stunning view from above. </p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>4. Seljalandsfoss Waterfall</strong></p> <p dir="ltr">Seljalandsfoss Waterfall is located by a main road, making it one of the most accessible waterfalls and very hard to miss. </p> <p dir="ltr">It drops 60 metres into a tranquil pool below and is one of the few places in the world where you can walk behind a waterfall. </p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>5. Reynisfjara Black Sand Beach</strong></p> <p dir="ltr">Reynisfjara Black Sand Beach is one of the most well-known black sand beaches in the world. It features fine textured soft black sand and a cave with huge geometric columns.  </p> <p dir="ltr">You can see the powerful waves of the Atlantic Ocean meet the shore and the towering basalt sea stacks jutting out from the ocean at 66 metres into the air.<span id="docs-internal-guid-65d3faf7-7fff-1267-2a1e-810c72dfce35"></span></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credit: Getty</em></p>

International Travel

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12 items you shouldn’t carry in your handbag

<p><strong>Passwords</strong></p> <p>If you have trouble remembering passwords, you might be tempted to carry them with you in your bag. “Some people feel passwords are safer in their bag than at home because it’s always on them, but nothing could be further from the truth,” says Eva Velasquez, CEO and president of Identity Theft Resource Center.</p> <p>“You’re much more apt to lose your purse or wallet than have a break-in.” Memorising all your login information is the safest, but if that’s not practical, she recommends storing your passwords in a passcode-protected smartphone app.</p> <p><strong>Debit card</strong></p> <p>Without the same protections as credit cards, debit cards put you at higher risk when making purchases. “I’m not a huge fan of always having a debit card with you, because the cash disappears from your account and you have to prove it was you before you get it back, unlike a credit card, where you can stop the charges and the money never leaves your account,” says John Sileo, CEO of cybersecurity group Sileo Group.</p> <p>Swipe a credit card for most purchases, and use an ATM-only card with a PIN to get cash, he recommends.</p> <p><strong>Laptop</strong></p> <p>A computer is probably the heaviest thing in your bag. The weight of a laptop can strain your shoulder, causing imbalanced posture, or even neck, spine, and shoulder injuries, says chiropractor Dr Steven Shoshany.</p> <p>If you need to have your laptop on hand, use a messenger bag or a backpack, which will distribute the weight more evenly, Shoshany suggests.</p> <p><strong>Receipts</strong></p> <p>A crook won’t be able to steal your identity with receipts alone, but pairing them with other documents could make it easier to pretend to be you. “It’s giving a thief a great picture of who you are and where you shop,” Velasquez says.</p> <p>“All fraud analytics look for anomalies in behaviour, and your receipts show where you shop.” With your old receipts, a thief might be able to make more purchases before you can cancel the card, so empty them from your bag once you’re home.</p> <p><strong>Unprotected phone</strong></p> <p>“A lot of people think of their smartphone as a phone instead of a mobile computer that happens to make calls,” Sileo says. Leaving your phone unprotected makes it easy for strangers to access any information you have stored in your apps.</p> <p>Even a four-digit password can be easy for thieves to crack, so use a longer code, or log in using fingerprint, face, or voice recognition, Sileo says.</p> <p><strong>Umbrella </strong></p> <p>You might be prepared for that 30 per cent chance of rain, but a bulky umbrella adds unnecessary weight. “Keep an umbrella in your car, or keep one at work and one at home,” Shoshany says.</p> <p><strong>Cheque book</strong></p> <p>Depending on your bank, getting your money back from cheque fraud could take anywhere from a day to four months, Sileo says. He recommends finding an alternative way to pay because cheques are so easy to steal.</p> <p>If you can’t bear to give up cheque writing, keep just a couple of cheques in your bag, not the whole book.</p> <p><strong>Full-size beauty products</strong></p> <p>Don’t weigh down your back by lugging around big bottles of hairspray. Over time, the repetitive strain of that added weight could start pulling your shoulder out, Shoshany says. “Downsize from full sizes to travel sizes to lighten the load,” he says.</p> <p><strong>Work badges</strong></p> <p>Giving a stranger access to your workplace could cause major problems in your job, Sileo says. Have a separate bag for the weekend or take your work ID out when you leave the office.</p> <p><strong>Gift cards</strong></p> <p>Like cash, you won’t get gift cards back if you lose them, so keep them with you only if you plan to use them in the store, Sileo says.</p> <p>If you’re afraid you’ll forget them when you do get around to shopping there, leave gift cards in your car in a disguised container like a breathmint tin, he says.</p> <p><strong>Medicare number</strong></p> <p>“Your medicare number is the critical piece of information a thief needs to carry out identity theft,” Velasquez says. Unless you need a copy for a new employer or are heading to a medical appointment, leave your medicare card at home in a secure place.</p> <p><strong>Passport</strong></p> <p>Because passports are hard to forge, a real one will be accepted more easily than other stolen documents, Velasquez says. Only carry it when absolutely necessary if it’s your primary identifier.</p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p> <p><em>This article originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.com.au/healthsmart/tips/12-items-you-shouldnt-carry-in-your-handbag?pages=1" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader's Digest</a>. </em></p>

Beauty & Style

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No, you shouldn’t wash raw chicken before cooking it. So why do people still do it?

<p>Food safety authorities and regulators <a href="https://foodsafety.asn.au/topic/tips-poultry/">around</a> <a href="https://www.cdc.gov/foodsafety/chicken.html#:%7E:text=after%20handling%20chicken.-,Do%20not%20wash%20raw%20chicken.,that%20previously%20held%20raw%20chicken.">the</a> <a href="https://www.food.gov.uk/safety-hygiene/cleaning">world</a> <a href="https://www.mpi.govt.nz/food-safety-home/preparing-and-storing-food-safely-at-home/clean-cook-chill/#:%7E:text=Don't%20wash%20raw%20chicken,food%20poisoning%20from%20campylobacter%20bacteria.">recommend</a> you don’t wash raw poultry before cooking. </p> <p>That’s because washing chicken can splash dangerous bacteria around the kitchen. It’s best just to thoroughly cook the chicken without washing it, so it is safe to eat.</p> <p>Despite this, chicken-washing remains common. A <a href="https://www.safefood.qld.gov.au/newsroom/does-raw-chicken-need-rinsing/">survey</a> by Australia’s Food Safety Information Council showed almost half of Australian home cooks washed whole chickens before cooking. Dutch research found <a href="https://www.foodsafetynews.com/2022/05/dutch-survey-finds-a-quarter-of-people-wash-chicken-despite-expert-advice/">25%</a> of consumers washed their chicken often or almost always.</p> <p>So why do people do it – and what does the research say about the risks of chicken-washing?</p> <h2>Chicken meat and germs</h2> <p>Incorrect cooking temperatures and cross-contamination between different foods are two of the most important factors linked to foodborne illness. </p> <p>This is particularly relevant to poultry meat. Two leading causes of foodborne illness are the bacteria <a href="https://www.cdc.gov/campylobacter/index.html">Campylobacter</a> and <a href="https://www.cdc.gov/foodsafety/communication/salmonella-food.html">Salmonella</a>, which are commonly found on raw poultry. </p> <p>In Australia, reported cases of Campylobacter and Salmonella have almost <a href="https://foodsafety.asn.au/topic/tips-poultry/">doubled</a>over the last two decades. </p> <p>Of the estimated 220,000 cases of Campylobacter infection each year, <a href="https://foodsafety.asn.au/topic/tips-poultry/">50,000</a> can be attributed either directly or indirectly to chicken meat.</p> <h2>Chicken-washing myths, busted</h2> <p>One <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.foodcont.2020.107682">analysis</a> of consumer responses to an education campaign about the dangers of washing raw poultry shed light on why many people still wash raw chicken before cooking.</p> <p>Some believe there is a need to wash faeces and other matter off the chicken meat. In fact, modern processing techniques mean chicken carcasses do not need additional cleaning. </p> <p>Others believe washing with a slightly acidic solution (such as vinegar or lemon juice) will kill bacteria. </p> <p>On the contrary, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.foodcont.2018.06.034">research</a> has shown washing raw poultry in lemon juice or vinegar does not remove bacteria and can increase the cross-contamination risk.</p> <h2>Washing chicken splashes bacteria around</h2> <p>One of the more compelling arguments why washing raw poultry under a running tap is a risky activity comes from <a href="https://doi.org/10.1063/5.0083979">recent research</a> on water droplets ejected from the surface of washed chicken. </p> <p>The study clearly showed bacteria can be transferred from the surface of the chicken to surrounding surfaces via water droplets.</p> <p>Using high-speed imaging, the researchers found a higher tap height can increase splashing. </p> <p>Chicken meat is often soft and the water flow can create a divot in the surface. This leads to splashing that would not occur on a curved, hard surface. </p> <p>The researchers placed large agar plates next to the chicken surfaces to capture any water droplets. This allowed them to grow the bacteria that were transferred with the splashed water. </p> <p>They found the level of bacterial transmission increased with greater tap height and water flow rate. </p> <p>Aerated water (which is what you get when the tap is running very hard) also increased splashing and bacterial transmission. </p> <h2>What if I still really want to wash my chicken meat?</h2> <p>While washing raw poultry is not recommended, it appears some home cooks are reluctant to let go of this old habit. </p> <p>If you insist on washing chicken meat, consider doing so in a sink of water rather than under a running tap.</p> <p>Use a paper towel to mop up any liquids, dispose of the towel and clean up afterwards. </p> <p>This will help reduce the risk of cross-contamination and keep the kitchen safe. And please wash your hands after handling raw meat!</p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p> <p><em>This article originally appeared on <a href="https://theconversation.com/no-you-shouldnt-wash-raw-chicken-before-cooking-it-so-why-do-people-still-do-it-192723" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Conversation</a>. </em></p>

Food & Wine

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5 foods you shouldn’t store in the fridge

<p>There are some foods that simply cannot stand the cold and if stored in the fridge will lose their flavour, texture and freshness. These five items are best stored in your pantry rather than the refrigerator.</p> <p><strong>1. Cucumbers</strong></p> <p>They’re often stored in the fridge but according to researchers at the University of California, storing the vegetable under 10°C actually causes “chilling injuries” to the cucumber. At low temperatures, the skin shrivels and pits, and the pulp turns mushy.</p> <p>If you like your cucumbers chilled, pop them in the fridge an hour before you want to eat so the cold won’t do damage.</p> <p><strong>2. Garlic</strong></p> <p>Garlic bulbs are prone to developing shoots if stored in the fridge as the cold environment is similar to their growing conditions. It’s best to store garlic in place where it’s cool and with low humidity, like an airy pantry.</p> <p><strong>3. Chocolate</strong></p> <p>The fridge may seem like the obvious place to put a melting bar of chocolate, but unfortunately it’s not. Chocolate is sensitive to sudden temperature changes and can develop a white “bloom” that spoils the smooth texture of chocolate if stored in the fridge. Store well-wrapped chocolate at room-temperature, away from strong-smelling foods. </p> <p><strong>4. Basil</strong></p> <p>Do you store the herb in the fridge to extend in shelf life? As delicate Mediterranean herbs such as basil come from warm, sunny climates, the chilled fridge temperature speeds up oxidisation, turning the leaves black and ruining the herb's scent and flavour. Store fresh basil at room temperature in a jar with water. This will lengthen its shelf life and prevent premature discolouration.</p> <p><strong>5. Bread</strong></p> <p>This may come as a shock to many but refrigerating bread doesn’t actually prolong its shelf life. While it may stop bread going mouldy, the cool, drying environment dehydrates the bread and speeds up the process of staling. Instead, store your bread in the freezer, which does extend the life of bread. </p> <p><em>Image: Getty</em></p>

Home Hints & Tips

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20 little things everyone forgets to clean – but shouldn’t

<p>We’re all doing our best to keep our homes clean these days. However, there are things even the most experienced cleaner can forget to clean. For example, did you know that your keyboards are a hotbed of bacteria? Or when was the last time you cleaned your shower curtain? To make sure your house is as clean as it can be, here are the 20 little things everyone forgets to clean.</p> <p><strong>Refrigerator</strong></p> <p>Your fridge could make you sick if you don’t clean it every once in a while. NSF International swabbed 20 kitchens as part of its 2013 Household Germ Study, and two of the germiest places were the vegetable and meat compartments in refrigerators. First, unplug the fridge and empty it out. Toss old containers and expired food, and wipe everything down with multipurpose spray. Soak drawers in warm water and scrub them clean with dish soap.</p> <p><strong>Pillows</strong></p> <p>Yes, you can place down and fibrefill pillows in the washing machine. Wash two at a time following the instructions on the care label. Otherwise, warm water on a gentle cycle will do the trick. The same settings work for your comforter (which can also use a washing).</p> <p><strong>Windowsills and window tracks</strong></p> <p>It’s easy to tell when your windows are dirty, but windowsills and tracks often go unnoticed. Dust away any loose dirt and dead bugs (or use a vacuum with a brush attachment). Use a spray bottle of white vinegar to spray the area and let it sit for a minute. Wipe with paper towels and use Q-Tips for those hard-to-reach areas.</p> <p><strong>Kitchen drawers and cabinets</strong></p> <p>It’s probably a good idea to keep the places you store all your food and dishes clean, right? Empty them out (preferably one at a time to avoid unnecessary clutter), toss expired food, and wipe everything down. Before returning everything to its rightful place, see if there’s any dishware you haven’t used all year. It would probably be better off donated.</p> <p><strong>Outdoor furniture</strong></p> <p>Make sure your outdoor furniture looks good as new before you start using it – nobody wants to sit on a dirty seat, or worse, a spider!</p> <p><strong>Garage </strong></p> <p>Organising your garage is just as important as actually cleaning it. You’d be amazed how much stuff accumulates in there over time – and how much you actually don’t need.</p> <p><strong>Shower curtain</strong></p> <p>Soap scum and mildew stains are haunting your shower curtain, but it doesn’t take long to clean them.</p> <p><strong>All the cards in your wallet</strong></p> <p>You use them almost every day, probably without thinking of how many times you touch them and how few times you’ve actually cleaned them. One in 10 bank cards were contaminated with faecal matter, according to a 2012 study. Wipe the card with a damp cloth or anti-bacterial wipe, then gently scrub the magnetic strip with an eraser.</p> <p><strong>Keys</strong></p> <p>Keys are another item you use daily, so they can definitely use a wash. To keep them clean and prevent rust, scrub with lemon and salt and rinse with dish soap. If they’re already rusty, soak them in a vinegar and water mixture for 20 minutes, rinse, then put them back in for another 30 minutes. This ensures the rust comes out completely.</p> <p><strong>Garbage bins</strong></p> <p>Its name implies that garbage bins are supposed to be dirty, but washing them out with a hose every once in a while will make taking out the rubbish a slightly less painful chore.</p> <p><strong>Doorknobs</strong></p> <p>Considering how many people are constantly touching them, knobs and drawer handles aren’t cleaned nearly often enough. Take a few minutes and wipe down the most touched knobs in your house.</p> <p><strong>Area rugs</strong></p> <p>Vacuuming rugs is easy enough to remember, but lift them up and you’ll find a whole lot of dirt and dust hiding in plain sight.</p> <p><strong>Small appliances</strong></p> <p>This includes microwaves, toasters, blenders, coffee pots, and any other small cooking appliances in the kitchen. Give each one a thorough cleaning, then be sure to clean underneath them as well.</p> <p><strong>Toys</strong></p> <p>Your child’s rubber ducky is a sneakily perfect location for mould. Take necessary precautions to prevent and remove mould on any bath toys. For that large bin of dolls and plastic trains, enlist your kids to help. Spend an afternoon going through toy bins, separating ones they want to keep and ones to donate and clean each toy before putting it back.</p> <p><strong>Computer and TV screens</strong></p> <p>First things first: make sure your devices are turned off and cooled off before you start cleaning. Wipe away dust and loose dirt with a soft cloth. Dip that cloth into a solution equal parts water and isopropyl alcohol and wring it out (it should be damp, but not wet). Gently wipe the screen and dry with a second cloth.</p> <p><strong>Reusable grocery and laundry bags</strong></p> <p>Think of all the places these bags have been: the floor, the boot of your car, the kitchen bench, the table at the laundromat. It’s time to give them a good cleaning. Throw them in the washing machine on a hot water regular cycle with the rest of your clothes. It can go in the dryer, too.</p> <p><strong>Reusable water bottles</strong></p> <p>You’re helping the environment. You’re staying hydrated. Now use your reusable water bottle to stay healthy and add it to your next load of dirty dishes.</p> <p><strong>Keyboards</strong></p> <p>When was the last time you cleaned your keyboard? If you can’t remember when it might be time to get on that. Keyboards can be home to staphylococcus aureus, a type of bacteria that can cause potentially serious infections in humans, according to a 2018 study published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health.</p> <p><strong>Showerhead</strong></p> <p>The next time you’re cleaning your bathroom, make sure you give special attention to your shower head. The bacteria commonly found on shower heads led to an increased risk of respiratory illnesses, according to 2018 research by the American Society for Microbiology. In fact, bacteria found on showerheads even led to an increased prevalence of lung disease according to the research.</p> <p><strong>Sink trap</strong></p> <p>Most of us know probably know that bathroom sinks are not the cleanest of surfaces. But did you know exactly how dirty your sink trap was? Sink traps caused an outbreak of antibiotic-resistant bacteria at an Israeli hospital, according to research published in Infection Control &amp; Hospital Epidemiology in 2018. Now, you certainly don’t want that happening in your own home.</p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p> <p><em>This article originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.com.au/food-home-garden/20-little-things-everyone-forgets-to-clean-but-shouldnt?pages=1" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader's Digest</a>. </em></p>

Home & Garden

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9 warning signs your elderly parent shouldn’t be living alone anymore

<p><strong>Keep an eye out for these issues</strong></p> <p>Ageing can be difficult, but it’s particularly challenging when the person who is ageing is a parent. Over time, life-long relationships can be upended and the parent – who has presumably spent a lifetime caring for a child – becomes the one who needs help. However, crossing that boundary is tricky and exposes all kinds of feelings and emotions for both the parent and adult child. Older people may want to stay in their home and maintain their independence, and that’s completely understandable. An adult child may not want to fight with a parent who’s determined to live on their own. But there may come a time when a living arrangement needs to change for a parent’s safety and welfare. Role reversal is difficult to navigate and it might be a challenge to know exactly when and how much help an elderly parent needs. Keep an eye out for these warning signs that an older parent or relative probably shouldn’t be living alone anymore.</p> <p><strong>They’ve suddenly lost weight</strong></p> <p>If you notice your parent is looking thinner than usual, it may be a sign that they’re not eating well, which could be a sign of the beginning of a cognitive illness. Lisa Gwyther, director of Duke University’s Family Support Program, explains that people suffering from memory impairment, such as Alzheimer’s disease, often either forget to eat certain meals or forget how to properly manage and cook their food, causing them to lose weight. If this is the case, you might want to discuss the possibility of having a home aide to make sure they receive adequate nutrition each day. You may also consider moving your loved one into your home, if that’s possible, or to an assisted living facility.</p> <p><strong>Their home is stacked with unopened mail</strong></p> <p>Towering heaps of unopened mail can be another clear indication of growing cognitive impairment. Gwyther says to keep a close eye out for unopened envelopes from creditors or charities your parents wouldn’t normally donate to. This can be a red flag that they’ve lost control of their judgement when it comes to smart spending, which can drive them into debt rapidly if it goes unnoticed.</p> <p><strong>They’re ignoring their personal hygiene</strong></p> <p>For someone with dementia or Alzheimer’s, remembering all of the cognitive steps involved with taking a shower every day can be challenging. It may be difficult for them to understand why they need to take a shower and how to do it, leaving them with an unhealthy hygiene routine. “‘You can tell them that it looks like they need a shower, but they just don’t see it,” Gwyther says.</p> <p><strong>They get lost when going to familiar places</strong></p> <p>Common destinations like the supermarket, the bank, or their place of worship should be familiar and easy to remember for your parent. If you find they can no longer find their way to these destinations, it’s a big red flag that something is wrong. Gwyther explains that if you can no longer trust your loved one’s ability to navigate their own town, it might be time to discuss moving or having live-in help for safety’s sake.</p> <p><strong>You notice changes in their home</strong></p> <p>A cluttered house isn’t necessarily a bad sign if your parent was always a bit messy, explains Peter Lichtenberg, PhD, director of the Institute of Gerontology and Merrill Palmer Skillman Institute. However, if they suddenly begin letting order slide after a lifetime of cleanliness, it might be a sign of an underlying cognitive issue. Additionally, watch out for items showing up in strange places around the home, like a litre of milk in the dishwasher instead of the refrigerator. According to Dr Lichtenberg, changes like these are often some of the clearest signs of dementia, and they could be a clue that your loved one is no longer in a position where it’s safe for them to be home alone.</p> <p><strong>Their Internet habits have shifted</strong></p> <p>For those with Internet-savvy parents, be on the lookout for any strange or unusual new online habits, as this could signal dementia or another similar illness. “People who are cognitively declining are at a real risk of ordering things they don’t need, taking on debt, and facing identity theft,” Gwyther says. “Even if they had been on the Internet and had been perfectly fine before, families need to be looking out for that.” You should also take a look at their Facebook or other social media accounts from time to time to make sure they aren’t accidentally befriending people who could be potentially dangerous. Gwyther explains that this is a common issue for people with cognitive disorders, as it’s hard for them to tell who’s a friend and who’s a foe.</p> <p><strong>They’re always exhausted</strong></p> <p>Dementia, Alzheimer’s disease, and other chronic conditions can disrupt circadian rhythms, keeping your loved one up all night and drowsy all day. As Gwyther explains, sleep is absolutely vital for both cognitive and physical functioning, and missing out on much-needed z’s can make a person’s condition even more serious. (Or a health condition could be the reason they aren’t sleeping.) If it seems like your parent’s lack of sleep is putting a significant crimp in their wellbeing, you may consider more supervision or help. Your parent may also benefit from seeing a geriatric psychiatrist who can help manage sleep issues.</p> <p><strong>They have a strange collection of new medications</strong></p> <p>If your parent’s medicine cabinet is suddenly filled with unusual or possibly unnecessary medications, a cognitive impairment could be the explanation. Gwyther explains that many patients with diseases like dementia or Alzheimer’s disease often accidentally misuse over-the-counter medications, as they’re trying to treat something that isn’t really the problem. She also says to make sure your parent is taking the medications they do need, and that they’re taking them at the appropriate times. If month-old bottles of their daily medication are sitting around completely full, it might be because they no longer can remember to take them.</p> <p><strong>They’re defensive</strong></p> <p>With a disease like dementia, people can become combative or suspicious of those around them – including family – as they can’t distinguish who’s trying to help and who’s trying to hurt them. If they are acting aggressively or appear to be collecting weapons in the house, flag it as a sign that they should no longer be living alone.</p> <p><strong>How do you start the conversation?</strong></p> <p>Bringing up the possibility of having a home aide or moving your parent into a nursing home or assisted living facility can be difficult. Dr Lichtenberg says to approach the topic delicately by asking your parent how they’re feeling and what their goals are, and asking whether or not they’ve noticed any changes in their behaviour. From there, you can introduce the idea of getting help, explaining that it’s a smart first step to achieving those goals. People with declining cognition often can’t understand that something is wrong, so it’s important to take it slow and account for their perspective.</p> <p><em><span id="docs-internal-guid-1fad8b12-7fff-6675-fb6a-c5c1d87894b7">Written by Abbey Schubert. This article first appeared in <a href="https://www.readersdigest.com.au/true-stories-lifestyle/relationships/9-warning-signs-your-elderly-parent-shouldnt-be-living-alone-anymore" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader’s Digest</a>. For more of what you love from the world’s best-loved magazine, <a href="http://readersdigest.innovations.com.au/c/readersdigestemailsubscribe?utm_source=over60&amp;utm_medium=articles&amp;utm_campaign=RDSUB&amp;keycode=WRA87V" target="_blank" rel="noopener">here’s our best subscription offer.</a></span></em></p> <p><em>Image: Getty Images</em></p>

Caring

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11 things you shouldn’t store in your bathroom

<p><strong>Medicine</strong></p> <p>Don’t keep your medicine in your medicine cabinet. We’re not just saying that to be ironic. Medicines and vitamins should be stored at a room temperature, below 25°C.</p> <p>Keeping them in a moisture-filled room, like your bathroom, can make them less potent or cause them to go bad before their expiration date.</p> <p><strong>Towels</strong></p> <p>Bathrooms are the perfect breeding ground for mould and mildew, and your towels are easily susceptible to these gross fungi.</p> <p>It’s fine to keep one towel hung up in the bathroom, as long as you swap it out once a week. Turning on an exhaust fan can help dry out the room and your damp towel faster.</p> <p><strong>Bathrobe</strong></p> <p>Another bit of ironic advice: keep bathrobes out of the bathroom. Just like towels, damp robes could harbour bacteria, and humidity can give them a musty odour.</p> <p>Let them dry in your wardrobe instead of on a hook in your bathroom.</p> <p><strong>Books</strong></p> <p>We get it – it can be nice to have some reading material available while you’re doing your business.</p> <p>But the books and magazines that are kept in the bathroom will absorb moisture, leaving you with wrinkled pages and deteriorating binding.</p> <p><strong>Jewellery</strong></p> <p>Jewellery boxes are generally kept on dressers and vanities for good reason. The humidity from your bathroom can make jewellery tarnish more quickly than normal, especially when it comes to sterling silver.</p> <p>Store your jewellery in a cool, dry place. Keeping it in an airtight bag is another effective method.</p> <p><strong>Toothbrush</strong></p> <p>Yes, all the rumours you’ve heard are true. A 2012 study from Manchester University in England found that your toothbrush may house more than 10 million bacteria, and a portion of that comes from faecal matter that’s sprayed around the room every time you flush the toilet.</p> <p>To keep your brush as germ-free as possible, rinse and air-dry it after each use, and, if you still choose to store it in the bathroom, close the toilet lid before you flush – and definitely, don’t store in next to the toilet.</p> <p><strong>Makeup</strong></p> <p>Leaving your prized makeup products in the bathroom exposes them to a lot of unwanted heat and moisture, which allows mould and other bacteria to spread and make your makeup go bad faster.</p> <p>And like toothbrushes, makeup brushes are also bound to get contaminated with faecal matter from sprayed toilet water. That’s something you definitely don’t want touching your face.</p> <p><strong>Perfume</strong></p> <p>Heat and perfume just don’t mix. The experts at perfume.org say that fluctuations in temperature (the kind that can occur when you take steamy showers) can destroy the molecular integrity of your fragrance and cause it to sour.</p> <p><strong>Nail polish</strong></p> <p>Most nail polishes will last about two years, but leaving those bottles in the bathroom can make them go bad – toss nail polish that doesn’t blend, is too thick, or looks crumbly – much faster.</p> <p>Again, heat and humidity are the culprits.</p> <p><strong>Razor blades</strong></p> <p>It’s fine to keep your current razor in the shower, but extra razor blades should be left outside of the bathroom.</p> <p>Otherwise, the humidity may rust or dull them before you even start to use them, <em>Good Housekeeping</em> reports. Drying razors after each shave can help keep them more effective longer.</p> <p><strong>Non-waterproof electronics</strong></p> <p>We love to sing in the shower as much as anyone, but humidity can do serious damage to your phone.</p> <p>If you need your tunes or morning news while you shower, invest in a shower radio (yes, they still exist) or a waterproof speaker.</p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p> <p><em>This article originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.com.au/food-home-garden/11-things-you-shouldnt-store-in-your-bathroom?pages=1" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader's Digest</a>. </em></p>

Home & Garden

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“I shouldn’t be saying it": Karl snaps over vaccines

<p>Today Show host Karl Stefanovic has caused outrage on-air after he admitted he would consider skipping the flu vaccine this year. </p> <p>In a <a href="https://9now.nine.com.au/today/videos/latest/dr-nick-coatsworth-answers-your-flu-season-questions/cl0k1jany00090lod6jofm2wz" target="_blank" rel="noopener">segment</a> with infectious disease expert Dr Nick Coatsworth on Thursday morning, he made the controversial comments that have divided viewers. </p> <p>“I know it’s irresponsible and I shouldn’t be saying it but I don’t want any more,” Stefanovic told the national audience.</p> <p>"You can say whatever you want, but I've had my fill of vaccines."</p> <p>Stand-in co-host Sarah Abo tried to salvage the segment, saying, “You know better than that. We are booking Karl in for his flu jab after this segment.” </p> <p>Dr Coatsworth responded calmly to the comments, saying Karl would not be the only one having these thoughts about the flu jab. </p> <p>“That’s a view people will be having, that they’ve had so much health information that they just want to switch off for a while,” he said.</p> <p>Despite the population feeling fatigued from vaccine information, the messaging of flu shot is clear to protect against seasonal flu injection. </p> <p>The annual <a href="https://www.health.nsw.gov.au/Infectious/Influenza/Pages/default.aspx" target="_blank" rel="noopener">influenza</a> vaccine is recommended for all Australians over six months of age, with Dr Coatsworth reminding viewers it is safe and effective. </p> <p>“It’s an effective vaccine and it will make an impact for the population if we all get our flu jabs this year,” Dr Coatsworth said. </p> <p>Karl's most recent comments are not the first time he has mentioned his exhaustion with health care talk, after he got heated during a segment discussing booster vaccines for overseas arrivals in February. </p> <p>“Isn’t it up to personal responsibility and personal choice to some point?’ Stefanovic demanded of the infectious disease expert Robert Booy, who was being interviewed for the segment.</p> <p>“Do we have to mandate everything? Are we going to mandate every vaccination now that is required?”</p> <p>The last two years of the pandemic have seen record low deaths during the influenza season due to lockdown periods, social distancing and mask wearing. </p> <p>In 2019, 1,080 people <a href="https://www.abs.gov.au/statistics/health/causes-death/causes-death-australia/latest-release" target="_blank" rel="noopener">lost their lives</a> to the annual influenza infections. </p> <p><em>Image credits: The Today Show footage - Channel Nine</em></p>

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Why smoking shouldn’t give movies an automatic R rating

<p>In an era when <a href="http://www.whitehutchinson.com/blog/2014/01/movie-attendance-continued-its-long-term-decline-in-2013/">cinema attendance</a> is in continual decline, the United States Surgeon General’s <a href="http://http//www.cdc.gov//tobacco/data_statistics/fact_sheets/youth_data/movies/index.htm">proposal</a> that all movies depicting smoking should be rated R is a particular form of silliness. </p><p>The Surgeon General <a href="http://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/data_statistics/sgr/50th-anniversary/">estimates</a> that giving an R rating to movies with smoking would reduce the number of young smokers in the US by nearly 18% and prevent one million deaths from smoking among children alive today. </p><p>But these statements are based on <a href="http://www.plosmedicine.org/article/info%3Adoi%2F10.1371%2Fjournal.pmed.1001078">questionable assumptions</a> and calculations.</p><h2>Beyond the cinema</h2><p>Advocates for R ratings argue two effects. R-rating would dramatically reduce the number of young people who would be exposed to smoking scenes in movies. And it would act as a major disincentive to movie producers to include smoking scenes because R rated movies attract smaller audiences. These producers would thus self-censor smoking scenes after doing the box office maths.</p><p>But studies purporting to demonstrate the power of smoking scenes to cause smoking already include R-rating movies in their smoking scene exposure assessments. In this 2007 <a href="http://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/119/5/e1167.long">paper</a>, for example, 40% of the films were R-rated. The same research team has also <a href="http://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/114/1/149.long">shown</a> that 81% of US adolescents are allowed to watch R-rated movies. </p><p>If youth who allegedly start smoking because of exposure to smoking in movies are already watching lots of R-rated movies, how would an R-rating reduce such exposure? </p><p>Moving movies with smoking to R-rating would put the onus on parents to regulate their children’s viewing. Few would disagree with that. But why would parents regulate their children’s viewing more because of concern about smoking than they do now because of concerns about exposure to strong violence and explicit sex in R-rated movies?</p><p>If the R-rating solution is designed to prevent youth seeing smoking, it may prevent them seeing it in cinemas, but it will not prevent them seeing the newly rated R movies elsewhere with consummate ease, increasingly so as download and i-View markets rapidly expand. It surely cannot be long until proponents of R-rating realise they will need to call for total movie censorship of smoking. If they’re comfortable with that, let them be open about it.</p><p>But I, for one, am not. And because the call for this proposal has received no serious consideration outside of the US and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Censorship_in_India">India</a> (a nation with a strong history of censorship), I’m certainly not alone. </p><h2>Art imitating life</h2><p>As I wrote <a href="http://www.plosmedicine.org/article/info%3Adoi%2F10.1371%2Fjournal.pmed.1001078">before</a> in the journal PLOS Medicine, I’m concerned that public health advocates think it’s reasonable for the state to regulate cultural products such as movies, books, art and theatre to further their cause.</p><p>Film isn’t just about the communication of public health messages to the masses. And children’s moral development and health decision-making is far complex than a response to wholesome role models. </p><p>Filmmakers depict all sorts of antisocial, unhealthy and even dangerous realities that we might expect in society. That doesn’t mean the behaviour is desirable or that the filmmaker is endorsing the behaviour. </p><p>In nations such as Australia which ban all forms of tobacco advertising, any evidence of paid tobacco product placement in movie would be a breach of the <a href="http://www.austlii.edu.au/au/legis/cth/consol_act/tapa1992314/">Tobacco Advertising Prohibition Act 1992</a>. There would be many inside the local film industry who would be appalled if tobacco companies were paying illegally for such scenes to occur. </p><p>There have been no whistleblowers exposing this here, so any smoking scenes are highly likely to be script and directional judgements.</p><p>Smoking prevalence in <a href="http://www.tobaccoinaustralia.org.au/chapter-1-prevalence/1-6-prevalence-of-smoking-secondary-students">Australian children</a> is at an all-time low, as it is in the <a href="http://www.tobaccofreekids.org/press_releases/post/2012_12_19_survey">United States</a>. This has been achieved by the sustained combination of policies and campaigns mostly directed at adults, but to which kids are also exposed. So while smoking in movies has been rising, smoking in kids has been falling.</p><p>There are many overtly and subtly negative treatments of smoking in movies and television that are probably contributing to the decay of smoking’s former status. This compilation from the globally massively popular <em>Friends</em> TV series is illustrative.</p><p>If R-rating advocates had their way, no adolescent should ever be exposed to such programs.</p><p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p><p><em>This article originally appeared on <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-smoking-shouldnt-give-movies-an-automatic-r-rating-30864" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Conversation</a>.</em></p>

Movies

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Why we shouldn't demonise processed food

<p>I have a radical suggestion: let’s ban processed and ultra-processed foods. Not the products, but the terms.</p> <p>With so many diet plans and nutritional instructions offering such varied advice on how to eat healthily, a simple message like avoiding processed food is understandably attractive. As a result, some journalists, <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/aug/11/why-we-fell-for-clean-eating">social media influencers</a> and even <a href="https://www.centerforfoodsafety.org/issues/305/food-and-climate/1-eat-fresh-unprocessed-foods">health charities</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/forget-about-fats-its-processed-food-we-should-be-worried-about-59850">academics</a> have gathered behind the idea that processed food is bad for you – and so-called ultra-processed food is even worse.</p> <p>This position has been taken to <a href="https://medium.com/better-humans/everything-you-need-to-know-about-the-whole-foods-diet-e4025c3d116c">detailed extremes</a>, with commandments not to eat food with more than five ingredients, with more than five steps in its manufacture, or even that contains any preservatives, “chemicals” or anything made in a factory.</p> <p>As a food scientist, I think such blanket advice, while easy to remember, is ultimately unhelpful. The demonisation of processing <a href="https://theconversation.com/processed-food-linked-to-cancer-uncritical-media-coverage-ignores-problems-with-study-91935">promotes misunderstanding</a> and mistrust of the ways in which science and manufacturing actually make food better for us.</p> <p>For a start, <a href="https://global.oup.com/academic/product/molecules-microbes-and-meals-9780190687694?cc=us&amp;lang=en&amp;">all food is processed</a>, and that’s a good thing. Processing is anything that transforms food from raw materials to something more suitable for human consumption. It can make food safer, more digestible and less susceptible to undesirable changes, while retaining or improving its nutritional and aesthetic qualities.</p> <p>At its simplest, processing is cooking, the discovery of which <a href="https://www.journals.uchicago.edu/doi/pdfplus/10.1086/692113">has been highlighted</a> as a <a href="https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2009/06/invention-of-cooking-drove-evolution-of-the-human-species-new-book-argues/">key step in human evolution</a> because it allowed us to absorb more energy to fuel our increasingly powerful bodies and brains. Today, besides a range of heat treatments that kill germs, other common processes used to preserve food include drying, fermentation, filtration, and freezing. In recent years, <a href="https://www.foodsafetymagazine.com/signature-series/an-overview-of-novel-processing-technologies-for-the-food-industry/">advanced treatments</a> involving ultra-high pressures or pulsed electric fields have been proposed to make food safer to eat while preserving its taste, texture and nutritional value.</p> <p>So why has the term “processed food” become so negative? Partly it’s because the term more often now refers to what’s in a food item and its nutritional information. In particular, it’s used to highlight foods with high levels of salt, sugar or fat, which can be linked to a <a href="https://www2.gov.scot/resource/0043/00438754.pdf">range of health problems</a>.</p> <p>Yet “processed food” is also often used to indicate products that contain a large number of ingredients, particularly what some deem “chemical” additives. It’s true that foods that haven’t had anything added to them can’t contain extra salt, sugar or fat. But there is no correlation between the number of ingredients and a product’s quality or safety.</p> <p>Meanwhile even simple food products are likely to be made up of many chemical components. For example, a banana contains fructose, maltose, tocopherol, phylloquinone and 2-methylpropan-1-ol. An apple contains acetic acid (E260), tartaric acid (E334), carotene (E160a), ascorbic acid (vitamin C, E300) and citric acid (E330), among other compounds.</p> <p>Those aren’t ingredients, you might say, but natural components. Mixing them together in a blender in the same proportions would not give the fruit back, or even the same nutritional profile. This may be the case, but they are still very clever assemblages of chemicals, often the exact same chemicals that can be found in manufactured food products with long lists of added ingredients.</p> <h2>Natural isn’t necessarily better</h2> <p>Many of these added chemicals are derived from natural sources. Others are often artificially synthesised versions of naturally occurring compounds, such as beta-carotene, which can be found in carrots, or vanillin, which is responsible for the flavour in vanilla. If the molecules from the factory and those from the carrot are identical, why is one seen as different to the other? Would it be preferable to have much more <a href="https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-problem-with-vanilla/">costly and wasteful processes</a> to extract them from their natural sources?</p> <p>Other ingredients are not found in natural food sources, and there is no question that, in the past (indeed for centuries), things were added to food that were not safe. For example, lead and mercury were once used <a href="https://www.safefood.eu/Food-Colour-Resource/History.aspx">as food colouring</a>. However, today the food industry in many countries is highly regulated, and modern understanding of food science and safety has resulted in the prohibition of potentially harmful additives.</p> <p>In Europe, food additives are given codes known as E-numbers. <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17825405">Research from 2007</a> that found six out of the hundreds of existing E-number additives were linked to hyperactivity in children led to the term becoming a pejorative description. But food containing any of those six compounds must now carry a warning label, while in all other cases an E-number actually reflects the fact that an additive has been tested and <a href="https://theconversation.com/explainer-what-are-e-numbers-and-should-you-avoid-them-in-your-diet-43908">certified safe</a>.</p> <p>The other thing to remember about all the added ingredients in food products is that including them costs the manufacturers money and so they must serve a function. Today, consumers have an enormously diverse range of needs, and foods are becoming increasingly specialised and tailored, with categories for infants, the elderly, vegans, people with allergies and many other specific markets.</p> <p>Making products that meet these people’s nutritional needs and still taste good often relies on large numbers of ingredients. Specialised products are needed to replace the nutrients of milk, the springiness provided by gluten, or the texture of meat. Food science has solved these problems by carefully optimising ingredients and control of their behaviour, from plant proteins for nutrition to xanthan gum for texture.</p> <p>Ultimately, <a href="https://global.oup.com/academic/product/molecules-microbes-and-meals-9780190687694?q=Molecules%2C%20microbes%20and%20meals&amp;lang=en&amp;cc=ie">all food is made of chemicals</a>, all ingredients have functions, and food products are not random assemblies of compounds added for no reason. These products are formulated to give them the number and type of ingredients they need to provide the nutritional, sensory, stability or safety attributes that consumers demand and legislation allows – no more and no less.</p> <p>The merits of a food should not be judged on the basis of its ingredient list, and food processing is not something of which we should be suspicious. But understanding processing, and what ingredients are in food and why they are there, has never been more important.<!-- Below is The Conversation's page counter tag. Please DO NOT REMOVE. --><img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important; text-shadow: none !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/128442/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /><!-- End of code. If you don't see any code above, please get new code from the Advanced tab after you click the republish button. The page counter does not collect any personal data. More info: http://theconversation.com/republishing-guidelines --></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/alan-kelly-893104">Alan Kelly</a>, Professor, Food Science and Technology, <a href="http://theconversation.com/institutions/university-college-cork-1321">University College Cork</a></em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="http://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/demonising-processed-food-undermines-our-trust-in-science-128442">original article</a>.</em></p>

Food & Wine

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Why you shouldn't dread conflict during the holidays

<p>Every holiday season, families and friends convene to share affection, kindness and experience. In the ideal holiday atmosphere, one often depicted in commercials and media, such get-togethers are places of warmth, appreciation and general happiness.</p> <p>If you find yourself in such a family, count yourself lucky and blessed.</p> <p>If your holiday is marked with stress and difficulty, then you may be part of the rest of America, where the holiday season brings real issues to light in addition to the positive experiences of the season.</p> <p>In my day-to-day work as a psychologist, specializing in mental health therapy with young adults, the holidays always bring to bear deep-seated issues. For many, family is something they have avoided by moving away for college, and thus coming home for the holidays forces them to engage in what they do not want to do and have successfully avoided for months. For the ill-equipped person, this sets the stage for disaster and even poor health. <a href="https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/stress/index.shtml">Long-term stress</a> has been linked to digestive problems, heart disease, sadness and depression. Some studies have shown that people undergoing stress have more viral infections.</p> <p>Fortunately, we can prepare ourselves for these encounters, go into them with open eyes and perhaps manage them better.</p> <h2>The power of acceptance</h2> <p>I work with people who often say things like “If only my dad didn’t drink too much,” “I wish my mom would accept how I choose to live my life,” “I need my brother to stop teasing me all the time.”</p> <p>While it is true that these statements reflect deeply held desires and such changes would bring drastic amounts of relief to the person’s life, there is also a reason these events have not occurred or changes have been made.</p> <p>I call this the “rejecting reality” standpoint, and all humans get held back by it. We spend years longing for a reality that is not true. A mom who doesn’t care about our weight, a dad who will express his affection toward us, a sibling who doesn’t take his own issues out on us. Under the rejecting reality mindset, we enter our homes for the holidays full of hope this time will be different, only to be disappointed for another year.</p> <p>And what happens when we are hurt? We withdraw or lash out, causing more conflict. Such a cycle may exist in your family dynamics for years if you start to closely examine it.</p> <p>The alternative, then, is to begin to cultivate what I term the “acceptance mindset.” This mindset involves dealing with exactly what is true, what is factual and what is realistic rather than all the things that we wish could be. Such a mindset involves opening ourselves to the pain involved in fully realizing our less-than-ideal lives. It means I will go to holiday dinner knowing full well my brother is going to tease me or my mom is going to comment on my appearance. Entering with this reality makes us less reactive and more capable of choosing what if anything we want to do about this dynamic.</p> <h2>To change or let go</h2> <p>I teach my clients a life skill called the “letting go process.” It involves three steps:</p> <ul> <li> <p>Notice and allow an experience to be there.</p> </li> <li> <p>Decide if the experience is useful or not.</p> </li> <li> <p>If useful, do something about it. If not, let it go.</p> </li> </ul> <p>Such a process has to be utilized continually during the holidays, when we are often once again confronted with dynamics and personalities we try to escape in our day-to-day lives.</p> <p>So what does this look like in practice?</p> <p>Jane is going home for a week to be with her family for the holidays. She is already dreading the trip, and in particular having to interact with her mother, who Jane knows will comment on her weight gain and criticize her for being single.</p> <p>So, using the letting go system, when Jane arrives and Mom asks her why Jane looks fatter than the last time Mom saw her, Jane:</p> <ul> <li> <p>Notices her hurt and frustrations with Mom after the comment and adopts the attitude of being ok having these feelings in the moment.</p> </li> <li> <p>Considers the usefulness of the feelings.</p> </li> <li> <p>Decides on whether to go a “change” route or a “let go” route.</p> </li> </ul> <p>The change route would involve engaging in a behavior to address the experience she is having: namely, Mom’s comments toward her. Jane could take an assertive stance and respond with an “I statement” such as “I feel really upset when you comment on my weight and I would appreciate it if you refrained from doing so for the rest of the time I am home.”</p> <p>At this point we do not know how Mom will respond, but we focus less on that outcome and instead on the process of what Jane can control. The process here is Jane’s own behavior in response to Mom. Mom may get defensive or angry, but Jane can feel good that she is standing up for herself.</p> <p>Alternatively, Jane could also choose to go the letting go route. By being able to notice her hurt and frustration in the moment, Jane becomes less reactive and is better able to not engage with Mom in an argument like has happened in the past. Jane is able to respond to Mom in a different way, or possibly not at all, changing the subject entirely.</p> <p>Jane could simply respond by asking Mom how she is doing or acknowledge that yes, she has gained weight. Jane is able to prevent her reaction from further escalating the possible conflict in the moment. This may seem overly simplistic, but with practice we can better let go of things that used to catch us and trap us into acting in unproductive ways.</p> <h2>Putting it into practice</h2> <p>As you head into your holiday events, take a minute to notice what thoughts, feelings and urges come up for you. This is just information, and all of it can help us prepare a plan.</p> <p>With this information available to you ahead of time, consider which route you want to go. Do you need to go a change route and address an issue, or do you need to let it go as something out of your control? You will now be more fully able to accomplish whichever route you choose.</p> <p>And just because something did not go well the first time you did it does not mean it cannot go well the next time. So even if Mom didn’t respect your wishes last time, it may be worth it to try it again, even if the reward is just that you can feel good about the process of being assertive for yourself.<!-- Below is The Conversation's page counter tag. Please DO NOT REMOVE. --><img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important; text-shadow: none !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/87979/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /><!-- End of code. If you don't see any code above, please get new code from the Advanced tab after you click the republish button. The page counter does not collect any personal data. More info: http://theconversation.com/republishing-guidelines --></p> <p><em>Written by <span>Nicholas Joyce, Psychologist, University of South Florida</span>. Republished with permission of </em><a rel="noopener" href="https://theconversation.com/dreading-conflict-during-the-holidays-let-it-go-let-it-go-let-it-go-87979" target="_blank"><em>The Conversation</em></a><em>.</em></p>

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Why you shouldn't throw away empty prepaid cards

<p><span>You may come into possession of a prepaid debit card through many different ways – perhaps you purchased it to keep your transactions secure and under control, or maybe it had been gifted to you. No matter how you use it, you might want to keep the card even after the balance is completely spent.</span></p> <p><span>Many people often would simply choose to declutter their wallet and throw out the card as soon as it is emptied out of instinct. However, it might be worth hanging onto – even when it’s used up, there are some reasons why keeping it may be beneficial or even necessary. Here are some situations where a used-up card may come in handy.</span></p> <p><strong><span>When you need a “dummy”</span></strong></p> <p><span>Many free trial programs require you to give out credit card details, so that you can be charged once the try-out period expires. Instead of putting reminders, you can avoid these unwanted charges by putting in the info of your empty prepaid card. </span></p> <p><strong><span>When you need to get a refund</span></strong></p> <p><span>Looking to get something returned to the store? If you are eligible for a refund or rebate, it often goes directly onto the card. The merchant might not be able to process it otherwise, as many banks have a matched refund policy to prevent fraudulent transactions. So if the card you used to purchase has been thrown away, you may have little luck re-accessing your money.</span></p>

Retirement Income

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Why you shouldn't keep the money you find on the ground

<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">What would you do if you saw a $50 note on the ground?</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Some may decide to pocket the bill without a second thought, but the Victoria Police have warned that such conduct would count as theft.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">A social media poll on the Victoria Police Facebook page has revealed that out of 21,600 people, only 36 per cent believed that the money should be handed over to the cops. </span></p> <p><iframe src="https://www.facebook.com/plugins/post.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Fvictoriapolice%2Fposts%2F2606015869470533&amp;width=500" width="500" height="477" style="border: none; overflow: hidden;" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowtransparency="true" allow="encrypted-media"></iframe></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">“A person can be charged with theft if they find something belonging to another person and they keep it, or they deal with it as if they are they owner of it,” the police force advised. You can take ownership of the banknote only if it has gone unclaimed for three months.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The information surprised many social media users, who said that it is nearly impossible to identify the rightful owner. “How do you prove that you lost the money to begin with?” one asked.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">“I'd be interested to know how many people go to the police station when they lose $50? I wouldn’t. Seems like a waste of police resources,” another commented.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">One added, “If it’s in a wallet and it contains ID then yes I would hand it regardless of what’s in it... but if a loose note floating in the wind… It’s a bit hard to know who it belongs to then I would keep.”</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Some claimed they would do the right thing and head to the police office right away. “I found $6000 in an envelope on the ground,” one chimed in. “I didn’t hesitate, gave straight to the police. Doesn’t matter how much it is, it doesn’t belong to you.”</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Another shared, “I would just hand it in. I have handed in a $20 note before....as it may have been money that a kid had mowed lawns for a month to earn, it may have been someone’s last $20.”</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Does the “finders keepers” principle apply in law? According to Queensland laws, keeping and using a loose cash you stumbled upon could count as ‘stealing’, unless you do not know who the owner or have attempted to find the owner to no avail.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Indeed, most legal experts believed that taking a small note might not land you in court, but there has been a precedent. In 2017, a British woman was <a href="https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-stoke-staffordshire-39129975">charged with theft</a> after pocketing a loose £20 banknote she found in a store.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Would you pocket a bill lying on the street? Let us know in the comments.</span></p>

Retirement Income

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Why you shouldn't throw away your old mascara wands

<p>They say we should replace our mascara every three months, so if you’re someone who goes by that long-spoken rule, then that’s quite a few mascaras you’re disposing of annually.</p> <p>But thanks to a new adorable initiative, your old mascara wands can be used for a great purpose. Animal charities are requesting for people to send empty tubes of mascaras their way, as the small bristle wands are the perfect tool to clean and comfort injured wildlife.</p> <p>Animals such as birds, rabbits, small rodents and baby fawns all find the comfort of their parents' grooming in these tiny cosmetic items.</p> <blockquote style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/BTnDXEWF27k/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_medium=loading" data-instgrm-version="12"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"></div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"></div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"></div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"></div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"></div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" rel="noopener" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BTnDXEWF27k/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_medium=loading" target="_blank">A post shared by Appalachian Wildlife Refuge (@appalachianwild)</a> on May 2, 2017 at 5:32pm PDT</p> </div> </blockquote> <blockquote style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/BTITUszFJ44/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_medium=loading" data-instgrm-version="12"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"></div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"></div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"></div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"></div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"></div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" rel="noopener" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BTITUszFJ44/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_medium=loading" target="_blank">A post shared by Appalachian Wildlife Refuge (@appalachianwild)</a> on Apr 20, 2017 at 6:55pm PDT</p> </div> </blockquote> <p>ARC – an animal rescue centre in Aberdeenshire, Scotland – made an appeal on social media for people to wash their old brushes and post it to them in a Ziploc bag.</p> <p>The bristles are used to remove oil, larvae, fly eggs, mites and mud from small animals.</p> <blockquote style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/BTWeOgPlqEZ/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_medium=loading" data-instgrm-version="12"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"></div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"></div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"></div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"></div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"></div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" rel="noopener" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BTWeOgPlqEZ/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_medium=loading" target="_blank">A post shared by Appalachian Wildlife Refuge (@appalachianwild)</a> on Apr 26, 2017 at 7:00am PDT</p> </div> </blockquote> <p>And they definitely didn’t expect the response that they received, as they are now overflowing with mascara wands, saying they have “more wands than Hogwarts”.</p> <p>Due to the overwhelming results, they have temporarily stopped the initiative.</p> <p>People from all over the world have sent their wands, with ARC writing on their Facebook page: “So many people have contacted us from all around the globe – how fantastic to have so much support for wildlife and for re-using items destined for landfill.</p> <p>“We hope we can secure a recycling facility for our used wands, and once we have this set up, we will post details of where they can be sent. The less plastic in our seas/landfill, the better!”</p> <p>Would you send someone your empty cosmetic items if it was for a good cause? Let us know in the comments below.</p>

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