A Western Australian dad has proven that true heroism requires no cape – just a pair of SpongeBob SquarePants undies and impeccable morning reflexes.
Tradie Dean Bathurst was rudely awakened to find a stranger getting far too familiar with his car at the family’s Bindoon property, about 70km north of Perth, shortly after 7am on Tuesday.
It was his 10-year-old daughter who spotted the alleged culprit first – a man reportedly yanking out wires from under the dashboard.
With no time to waste – nor pants to put on – the 57-year-old burst outside in his bright yellow SpongeBob jocks, ready to defend both his vehicle and his dignity.
“It was probably a good 10-minute wrestle around on the ground, trying to get him in a position where we could stop him from hurting us, or hurting him, or running away,” he told 9News.
Enter the reinforcements: Bathurst’s sons, who found their half-naked dad grappling with a would-be car thief on the lawn. Naturally, they leapt into action too – because there’s nothing that unites a family like wrestling a stranger at sunrise while Dad is dressed in nothing but cartoon-themed underwear.
“You know, you got the fight or flight. I’ve got a strong fight,” Bathurst said – proving that even in underwear featuring a cheerful cartoon sponge, masculinity remains intact.
Son Brooklyn then applied the classic “human paperweight” manoeuvre.
“I’m 120 kilos, so he wasn’t moving as I lied across his legs and his lower back, and just tried to hold out,” he said.
The Bathursts pinned the man for a full 30 minutes, ensuring police arrived before anyone suffered a wardrobe malfunction.
After the arrest, Bathurst reflected on his wardrobe choices with the kind of solemnity usually reserved for royal speeches, “I might actually go to bed dressed a bit better than my SpongeBob jocks from now on,” he said.
“Good thing I wasn’t wearing my Superman jocks, because that could have been a completely different situation.”
Police allege the 31-year-old suspect had already spent the morning on a criminal road trip beginning around 3.30am in Gosnells, where he allegedly forced his way into a woman’s vehicle – while appearing to be armed – and indecently assaulted her.
He then allegedly continued north to Bindoon, broke into a home and stole another vehicle – before running into SpongeBob Dad and Co., who brought the adventure to an abrupt end.
The man has been charged with armed robbery, deprivation of liberty, unlawful and indecent assault, and stealing two vehicles.
He was denied bail in Armadale Magistrates Court, where, thankfully, everyone was fully clothed.
Images: 9News
