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Betty White turns 97! Here's her secret to a long life

Six-time Emmy award winner Betty White has nearly been around for an entire century. As the star has turned 97 recently, she shared with <a rel="noopener" href="https://parade.com/634316/samuelmurrian/betty-white-on-her-legacy-memories-and-her-recipe-for-living-a-long-happy-life/" target="_blank">Parade </a>her favourite memories and how she’s managed to live a long and happy life. “I know it sounds corny, but I try to see the funny side and the upside, not the downside. I get bored with people who complain about this or that. It’s such a waste of time,” White revealed. White’s life tips tend to focus on the positive side of life. “Enjoy life,” she says. “Accentuate the positive, not the negative. It sounds so trite, but a lot of people will pick out something to complain about, rather than say, ‘Hey, that was great!’ It’s not hard to find great stuff if you look.” As she’s had a lot of time to focus and reflect upon her life, there’s not a lot White tends to dwell on. “I don’t have time to miss much,” she says, “because I’m still working.” “I just love to work, so I’ll keep working until they stop asking.” She also gave some straightforward advice for the newcomers in the brutal world of show business. “Do your work, learn your lines and come in prepared,” she says. “Don’t think you can wing it, because you can’t. We’re in show business, which is fun, but take your business seriously, because it is a serious business.” Speaking of show business, she’s not worried about the entertainment industry’s fate either, as a new generation of funny men and women break through the ranks. “I think the business is in pretty good shape; I don’t have to fix it,” She smiles. “I will, but I don’t have to."

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Wisdom from my 97-year-old mum on gardening and cats

Robyn Lee is in her 70s and lives with two lovable but naughty cats. She has published a book on seniors behaving badly, entitled Old Age and Villainy, and considers herself an expert on the subject. The Matriarch (TM) is a very positive woman and always has been. If any of us have problems, her favourite comment is always “when one door closes, another opens,” or, “count your blessings, it could be worse.” Sometimes it wouldn’t be received very well by the person to whom it was directed. But TM could always see the bright side of things and she was usually right. Although there was one occasion when it wasn’t appreciated at all. I can’t recall the incident, but TM told me about it later and said, “well, my intentions were good”, then added, “the road to hell is paved with good intentions… although I’m not sure what that means!” She was one to count her blessings though and delighted in the small things in life. She derived enormous pleasure from her garden when the tenderness she’d lavished on a sickly plant rewarded her care with brilliant blooms. Her excitement knew no bounds when seeds or bulbs she had planted first peeped through their covering of soil. I would call in for coffee and she would say, “come and see my beautiful gladdies” (gladiolus), or “my frangipani is finally flowering!” and joyfully show me whatever else in her beautiful garden that may have caused her delight. Then we would come back inside to cold coffee… When I first arrived in Australia, because of the different climate, I didn’t have much success with growing houseplants. The exotic houseplants I grew so well in New Zealand didn’t survive when I tried to grow them indoors here because they were used to the strong sunlight and dry conditions and didn’t like being housebound. I had to learn a whole new way of growing things. TM was in Australia visiting me one time. By then I’d got the trick of growing plants successfully, so much so that my patio looked like a rainforest. However, I was struggling with a staghorn which didn’t look very well at all. TM caught sight of it. “Oh, the poor thing,” she murmured sadly. I felt as if I’d kicked a puppy… However, during her stay she nurtured it and suggested a better place for the plant. I had that staghorn for years along with all the other pot plants. I eventually gave them to my daughter when I downsized some years ago and they’ve matured into beautiful specimens in the mini rainforest on her property. TM was very happy to see them thriving, especially the staghorn. TM also loved animals and nature in all shapes and forms, but she has a special place in her heart for cats. In fact, our whole family, including the extended tribe, loves cats. You can’t visit anyone without a moggy mooching around the place or jumping onto your lap. When Father was alive, he and TM had a beautiful smoky grey longhaired cat to whom they gave the very original name of “Tom”. He was a fiend of a cat though. He had the sweetest looking face and would walk towards an unsuspecting visitor, plumy tail held high and waving gently. The hapless visitor would bend to stroke him and he’d immediately swipe at them with an enormous paw or sink his fangs into their hand. Yet, with people he knew, he was surprisingly gentle. TM hated taking him to the vet and Tom hated the vet. According to TM, he’d yowl at full voice and spray everything and anyone who came near him. “He’s so awful,” said TM, embarrassed at the way her errant pet had behaved. “The poor vet has to wear leather gloves to prevent being scratched to ribbons. Believe me, if Tom didn’t injure himself or need vaccinating, we’d never go near the vet!” Father always said TM could speak “cat”. I heard the proof for myself one day. Tom had this tiny little “mew” (except when he was screeching at the vet), and I could hear him carrying on and on. I went to investigate and found TM and her cat eyeball to eyeball having a conversation. Tom would mew then TM would mew back, so it went back and forth. I stood there watching this in amazement then laughed, it looked and sounded so funny. TM wasn’t the slightest bit perturbed and told me Tom had been telling her about his day. Right… Another time, I wondered who TM was talking to. I heard, “What’s the matter, Tom?”. A mew. “Are you feeling pale?” Another, pathetic little mew. “Would you like some din-dins?” And so on. We’re inclined to treat our cats as surrogate children and TM was worse than all of us put together. During our phone conversations, she always asks after “the girls”. Not my daughters, but my cats! As this is the last story on TM, she joins me in wishing you all a very happy Christmas, a wonderful 2018 and asked me to thank you for the lovely comments you’ve left during the year. Merry Christmas, everyone! This is the last piece in Robyn’s series on her 97-year-old mother (aka The Matriarch). Read part one <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/04/robyn-lee-on-her-97-year-old-mother/" target="_blank">here</a>, part two <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/05/robyn-lee-on-the-matriarch-receives-a-pacemaker/" target="_blank">here</a>, part three <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/06/most-shocking-things-my-mum-said/" target="_blank">here</a>, part four <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/07/the-moments-my-97-year-old-mother-stunned-us-all/" target="_blank">here</a>, part five <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/08/robyn-lee-the-matriarch-outrageous-parties/" target="_blank">here</a>, part six <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/09/robyn-lee-matriarch-learns-valuable-life-lesson/" target="_blank">here</a> and part seven <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/10/robyn-lee-the-matriarch-writes-a-letter/" target="_blank">here</a>.

Family & Pets

The letter from my 97-year-old mother that had me in stitches

Robyn Lee is in her 70s and lives with two lovable but naughty cats. She has published a book on seniors behaving badly, entitled Old Age and Villainy, and considers herself an expert on the subject. I may or may not have mentioned previously how my mother, The Matriarch (TM) and her husband (The Third) would regularly update the family with regard to their eventual demise. You know, wills, funeral director, etc. For years TM insisted she didn’t want mournful hymns but wished to have Frank Sinatra’s “My Way” and Louis Armstrong’s “When the Saints Go Marching In” played at her funeral. However, as time went on she started revising these plans. In one of our phone conversations, she informed me that the family could expect a letter outlining the changes. I received the letter a couple of weeks later and promptly rang my daughter to discuss it with her. I read out what TM had written and both my daughter and I were helpless with laughter at the contents. In her inimitable way, TM wrote down exactly what she wanted and I’ve shared it below with the only changes being names, otherwise it’s word for word as she wrote it, punctuation and all. “Dear Robyn The Third and I have spent a lot of time and deliberation over the planning of our funerals. Our main concern is to make it as simple as possible for those of you who are left to cope. We both feel that changing the venue is an unnecessary hassle, so we are leaving things as they are with the funeral director. Because all of our friends have predeceased us, and for the same reason, we have great grandchildren we have never met, we have decided that we do not want a funeral!!!! When the time comes, we have decided we would like you to phone the funeral director and tell them that we are ready to go, whoever goes first. This might seem drastic to you, but we have seen too many funerals in our chapel where the hearse sits outside with one or two mourners to pay their respects. Such a dreary sight, and we don’t do dreary. We do not want flowers, wreaths and bunches are depressing. We absolutely forbid viewing. Why would anyone want to look at a dead face?? We might not be very pretty but we can still grin. No eulogies. Tell us what you can think of us while we can hear, not when we can’t answer back. Forget what we wanted eleven years ago. Singing “When the Saints go Marching in” might have sounded OK then, but we cringe that the sound of your off-key warbling eleven years later would resurrect us. We mostly do not want people attending our funerals from a sense of duty. We’d rather that they stayed home and had a drink to us. We understand that you might be unhappy about our wishes, and we understand that, but we would really like it if you would put a notice in the newspaper to the effect that according to their wishes The Matriarch/The Third had a private funeral on such and such a date. That’s all I think folks. We have nothing to say except we love you all and we have been blessed to have belonged to such a loving family.” I think that letter encapsulates The Matriarch beautifully. She gets her point across with humour and style. There was an untoward reaction from one extended family member though and I became quite angry when I heard about it. It caused poor TM a lot of worry and upset. This family member told TM that as I lived in Australia, I would be very hurt and upset about these plans and that it was wrong to exclude me. I found out when I had rung and TM, in a very small voice, asked if I was still speaking to her. At that stage, I had no idea what had gone on and when TM explained and told me she had been so worried and upset, I was furious with this relative. I told TM how I’d rung my daughter and that we both agreed her letter had made our day. I also reassured her that the relative was the one with the problem, not me! TM was so relieved to hear that, but my daughter and I were pretty disgusted that TM was put in such a position at her age. It was also a fortunate piece of luck that I didn’t have an up to date phone number for this relative… there would have been fireworks! Robyn is writing a series on her 97-year-old mother (aka The Matriarch). Read part one <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/04/robyn-lee-on-her-97-year-old-mother/" target="_blank">here</a>, part two <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/05/robyn-lee-on-the-matriarch-receives-a-pacemaker/" target="_blank">here</a>, part three <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/06/most-shocking-things-my-mum-said/" target="_blank">here</a>, part four <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/07/the-moments-my-97-year-old-mother-stunned-us-all/" target="_blank">here</a>, part five <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/08/robyn-lee-the-matriarch-outrageous-parties/" target="_blank">here</a> and part six <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/09/robyn-lee-matriarch-learns-valuable-life-lesson/" target="_blank">here</a>.

Family & Pets

The valuable lesson my mum learnt at 97

Robyn Lee is in her 70s and lives with two lovable but naughty cats. She has published a book on seniors behaving badly, entitled Old Age and Villainy, and considers herself an expert on the subject. My stories about The Matriarch (TM) have always been humorous and while this does have its funny moments, there is a lesson here which would benefit us all, especially those of us over 60 and beyond. I rang TM one morning, about a week ago. Her husband (The Third) answered the phone as he usually does but this time seemed quite subdued. On my query, he replied that TM couldn’t take my call as she was sick and sleeping. We both thought she had this nasty virus currently doing the rounds, that starts as a head cold but may progress to upper and/or lower respiratory infections. I could tell The Third was worried we were going to lose her and for a few days, I jumped every time my phone rang. I gave TM time to get over the worst of her virus before ringing again, and to my relief she answered sounding very well, with no hint of a cough or sniffle. I commiserated with her on having had the nasty virus and mentioned I’d had it, too, so I know how miserable it would have been for her. But… “Oh no, I didn’t have that,” declared TM. “I almost killed myself!” Whaaaaat?? TM suffers from essential tremor, an inherited condition which afflicts a few in our family. Unlike Parkinson’s, it is a very fine shaking of the hands which becomes worse over time. Wine has a positive effect on it. Truly… I’m serious here and it has been proven so in medical studies. I’m rather happy to hear that. Now where’s my glass… Anyway, poor TM was finding it difficult to pour herself a glass of water. The jug would shake, the glass would shake with water slopping all over the place and trying to find a straw to drink through was too much. In exasperation TM decided to give up drinking fluids. I know, you’re all thinking the same as I did… not good, TM! As you’ve probably guessed, she became quite sick so visited the doctor who ran a battery of tests, including a urine test. Amazingly, no one picked up the fact that TM’s urine was very dark, however, TM did. As she proudly informed me, “I diagnosed myself! As soon as I realised that I was dehydrated, I had a big glass of water… and promptly brought it back up.” Good one, TM. Well, once everyone realised what was wrong, it was easily remedied. TM learnt to just take sips of water to gradually rehydrate herself. One of the nursing staff gave her a vacuum drink bottle, with a top similar to a sippy cup, so now TM finds it a lot easier to keep her fluids up. She went on to say, “During that time, I became confused and told one of the nurses, my head was swollen and my shoulders were sore from carrying it around. The nurse wrote in her notes that I had a headache! We all had a good giggle about it after.” Now that she is settled and able to keep up her fluid intake more easily, we’re all happy we have The Matriarch with us still. TM is also happy that she can still have her glass of wine or three in the evenings without the fear of wasting any because of her shaking hands. Life is good. Robyn is writing a series on her 97-year-old mother (aka The Matriarch). Read part one <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/04/robyn-lee-on-her-97-year-old-mother/" target="_blank">here</a>, part two <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/05/robyn-lee-on-the-matriarch-receives-a-pacemaker/" target="_blank">here</a>, part three <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/06/most-shocking-things-my-mum-said/" target="_blank">here</a>, part four <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/07/the-moments-my-97-year-old-mother-stunned-us-all/" target="_blank">here</a> and part five <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/08/robyn-lee-the-matriarch-outrageous-parties/" target="_blank">here</a>.

Family & Pets

The moments my 97-year-old mother stunned us all

Robyn Lee is in her 70s and lives with two lovable but naughty cats. She has published a book on seniors behaving badly, entitled Old Age and Villainy, and considers herself an expert on the subject. My 97-year-old mother (aka The Matriarch, or TM for short) is an original in that we never know what she is going to come out with in a conversion. She can emit the most wonderful Mrs Malapropisms and get her words mixed with hilarious results. TM and her husband (we shall call him The Third) live in a retirement village. TM had lived there for some years previously with her second husband, my much-loved stepfather so when she and The Third married, the arrangement stayed the same... only with a different husband. Their retirement village has a policy whereby no resident is ever asked to leave if they run out of money. The complex has a fund, improbably named the Puckey Fund, from which money is provided if some unfortunate soul runs out of cash. Various fundraising activities are held throughout the year with the proceeds going to the Fund which is wisely managed by the trustees or some other illustrious body. They also have a lot of money willed to them by deceased residents. On one memorable occasion TM was describing the above to a couple of friends and in her enthusiasm transposed the first two letters of the words Puckey Fund. A stunned expression crossed her face as her friends reacted with screams of laughter and she realised what she had said. To give TM her due, she has since related that episode, laughing at herself. The Matriarch is an avid nature watcher and gardener. Back in the ‘60s, she and my late stepfather purchased a licensed restaurant which they ran until the mid-70s. To TM’s delight there were two enormous oak trees flanking the entrance to the long driveway. I visited them one Sunday not long after they had moved and was excitedly greeted by The Matriarch with the eyebrow raising pronouncement that there were “two magpies rooting in the oak trees.” I looked at TM in amazement and suggested she may want to rephrase that. She was obviously mixing up her gardening activities with the magpies' springtime antics. I remember in one of our phone conversations, she was telling me about a young married couple in my extended family who were trying to make babies, “Your cousin is going to help them.” “What, make babies?” My mind boggled! “Don’t be so silly,” replied TM. “She’s going to help them paint the nursery.” I think I may have mentioned this one some time ago. I was thrilled at my cholesterol results which had dropped back to normal. On relating this good news to The Matriarch, she commented that it was unusual and asked how I did it. I explained that I had cut out eating red meat and put the positive result down to that. “Oh, I couldn’t do that,” declared TM. “I’m a real cannibal!” She meant carnivore but <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/03/robyn-lee-on-her-proud-heritage/" target="_blank">considering the history of our ancestors</a>, there may be more truth to that statement than we know! Robyn is writing a series on her 97-year-old mother (aka The Matriarch). Read part one <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/04/robyn-lee-on-her-97-year-old-mother/" target="_blank">here</a>, part two <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/05/robyn-lee-on-the-matriarch-receives-a-pacemaker/" target="_blank">here</a> and part three <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/06/most-shocking-things-my-mum-said/" target="_blank">here</a>.

Family & Pets

Prince Harry reunites with 97-year-old Aussie fan

As Prince Harry arrived in Sydney to launch the 2018 Invictus Games, the charming royal stopped by Circular Quay yesterday to greet fans. Despite the rain, Harry went through the crowd shaking hands with those excited to meet him for over half an hour. While the royal was making his way through the crowd, he spotted a familiar face. Daphne Dunne, 97, was greeted by Harry with a peck on the check when he got to her in the crowd. The Prince also said “Oh, it’s you,” before embracing her. <img width="498" height="415" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/37833/2017_498x415.jpg" alt="2017"/> The pair previously met in 2015 when Prince Harry was serving with the Australian Defence Force for a month. Daphne was wearing her late husband, Albert Chowne’s, medals including his posthumously awarded Victoria Cross for his efforts during the Second World War. “He kissed me on the other cheek this time,” she told <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/06/07/prince-harry-gives-97-year-old-admirer-peck-cheek-sydney/" target="_blank">The Telegraph</a>. “He really is a lovely young [man] and he’s warm and genuine and really cares about the injured servicemen and women, he’s doing a fantastic job supporting them.” On Wednesday, Harry spoke at the launch of the Invictus Games at Australian Governor General, Peter Cosgrove’s, official Sydney residence, Admiralty House on Sydney Harbour. Other speakers included the Australian Governor General and Australian Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull. Several Invictus athletes were also in attendance. “Sport is what would make the difference. Sport would help these guys and girls fix their lives and reconnect with those around them. And the spectacle of sport combined with stories of recovery against the odds would inspire everyone who saw it,” Harry said.

International Travel

Meet the matriarch of our family, my 97-year-old mother

Robyn Lee is in her 70s and lives with two lovable but naughty cats. She has published a book on seniors behaving badly, entitled Old Age and Villainy, and considers herself an expert on the subject. My mother is 97 years old and still going strong, although as she ruefully confesses, her mind is active but her body isn’t. I come from a large family of which mum is the matriarch, which is how I’ll refer to her, or else TM (it’s easier to type). Over the years her sense of humour and pragmatism have given us a good laugh as well as teaching my brothers and me some valued lessons, some of which were rather painful in our childhood! One of the things TM is very pragmatic about is her eventual demise and we are updated regularly on her will, her funeral (she wishes to be cremated) and other matters regarding that event. Don’t worry, there’s nothing morbid here, quite the reverse. With one of my brothers as well as myself living in Australia (he has since moved back to New Zealand), TM told us both several times that she didn’t want us to spend the money on attending her funeral. “I’m not going to know if you’re there or not,” she said to me on one occasion. “Exactly,” I retorted, “so how are you going to stop us? Besides,” I added, “we want to come for the wake afterwards so we can talk about you.” I was then threatened with her returning to haunt me! She had made my youngest brother and my cousin executors of her will for two reasons…they both still lived in close to TM and my cousin was a paralegal so it made sense. After the usual evening wine or three, TM was updating them on her will...again...when my cousin looked at her and said, “And now, we wait...and we wait...” When TM related this to me in one of our phone conversations, I predictably reacted with laughter. “Talk about a black sense of humour,” grumbled The Matriarch. "That's what everyone does when I tell them about that!" I remember a few years ago, I received a letter from her, which started off, “My dear family,”. It went on to tell us how much she loved us, how thankful she was to have such a wonderful family and other things in this vein. Alarmed, I promptly rang her to find out what had happened. I had visions of her having been diagnosed with some dreadful illness and being given only a short time to live. When I queried what was wrong, she started to laugh. Apparently, my brothers and members of my extended family to whom she had also written, had much the same reaction. From what TM said, all she wanted to do was to tell us all how much she loved us, how proud she was of us and to thank us for being there for her. It had an unexpected result in that her phone rang hot with alarmed questions from various family members asking her what was wrong. It was not quite the response she had anticipated. In the meantime, she'd decided on a couple of songs for her funeral. One of them was “When the Saints go Marching In” by Louis “Satchmo” Armstrong, the other “My Way” by Frank Sinatra. When I asked her why she wanted “Saints”, her reply? “Because I like it.” Okay, fair enough. Although when she told an acquaintance what she had chosen the reaction was one of horror. “You can’t have songs like that!” protested the horrified one. “Why not?” queried TM. “Oh, no. That’ll never do. I want my family to be absolutely devastated with grief at my funeral and I’m going to have all the sad hymns,” replied the other. "No,” rejoined TM firmly, “I want my family to remember me in a happy manner. I don’t want them weeping and wailing when I pop my clogs! Therefore, I’m having those two songs, and,” she added, “it’s in my will.” I’ve been telling her for the last 30 years that only the good die young and at 97, she’s well on the way to proving it. I want to be like her when I grow up. Do you have a story to share? Share your story with the Over60 community <a href="http://www.oversixty.com.au/community/contributor/community-contributor/" target="_blank">today</a>.

Family & Pets

97-year-old man refuses to retire

Meet the 97-year-old Australian worker who wouldn’t dream of retirement. Clive Letton is an Australian toolmaker. After going to work every day for 70 years, he sees no need to slow down now. Letton opened his business, Rider & Bell nearly seven decades ago. The company manufactures tools, letterboxes, fishing gear and whistles. Despite his age of 97, Letton doesn’t see retirement in his future: “Never, never,” he said. “What for? I still got two hands, I can still move around.” Despite his relentlessness, Letton’s son says his father hasn’t been exempt from health problems. “He’s had a heart attack, he’s had prostate cancer, he’s had a couple of strokes,” Letton’s son said. Still, Letton sees no reason to stop working now, likely making him one of the oldest working citizens of Australia. Related links: <a href="/news/news/2015/07/worlds-most-popular-books/">World’s most popular books revealed</a> <a href="/news/news/2015/07/deer-sounds-bizarre/">You won’t believe what deer sound like when they scream</a> <a href="/news/news/2015/07/humpback-whale-sydney/">Humpback jumps out of water and entertains onlookers in Sydney</a>

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97-year-old grandma has a dance off with her great-granddaughter

When her eight-year-old great-granddaughter started dancing to her favourite pop song, this 97-year-old granny decided to show the young’un that she still has some serious dance moves up her sleeve. We don’t know who won the dance off? Tie? Related links: <a href="/news/news/2015/07/four-year-old-cancer-patient-marries-nurse/">4-year-old cancer patient “marries” her favourite nurse</a> <a href="/news/news/2015/07/government-euthanise-feral-cats/">Government to kill 2 million feral cats in defence of wildlife</a> <a href="/news/news/2015/07/homeless-people-photographs/">Powerful photographs portray homeless people in ways you’ve never seen</a>

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Betty White turns 97! Here's her secret to a long life

Wisdom from my 97-year-old mum on gardening and cats