The right age for kids to get their own mobile phone
Remember the time before mobile phones? You would make a plan with a friend to meet up on Friday night at 7pm at a certain place, and you’d do everything you could to get there – because you had no way of letting them know you were running late (or not coming at all). Or when you wanted to call someone you liked but you had to run the risk of their scary dad answering their home phone?
Those days are long gone thanks to the proliferation of mobile phones. Now we can make new plans, change plans, share photos and search the internet all from the palm of our hand.
For kids, this is completely normal. So it won’t be long before they are harassing you to get them a phone. But when is the right time to allow them their own phone?
As grandparents, the dangers and risks of phone ownership are clear. Access to porn sites, kids being approached online by 50 year old people masquerading as being 10, cyber bullying, sharing private photos of themselves. The list goes on.
But the reality is that mobile phones aren’t going anywhere and it will only be a matter of time before your grandchild wants one.
In the US the average age to get a smartphone (such as an iPhone) is 10, and this is similar in the UK But that doesn’t mean that you need to hand over a phone on their 10th birthday.
Every child is different, and you need to assess their maturity level, how they take care of their belongings, and also what they want to use it for. Have the discussion about usage first, as there is no need to rush out and buy an expensive smartphone if they only want to be able to call you in an emergency.
Research says that it’s not a good idea to ban all phone use as this can backfire. Instead, explain your fears about phone ownership to your child so that they can see your point of view. Let them know that you just want them to be safe. You can discuss stories from the news (depending on the child’s age), which have occurred as a result of phone or internet use. These give you a powerful tool to get the message across, as it’s not you being dogmatic but rather an external message.
Set some ground rules for usage before you hand over the phone, as this is much easier than trying to make changes later. For instance you might say that phones have to be left in the kitchen at night, or that they don’t use them during mealtimes.
Remember that just because we didn’t grow up with a smartphone, that doesn’t mean our childhood was any better or worse. If anything, it’s tougher now for a kid having to grow up in a world where they have so much access to information. We just need to help give them the skills to use it correctly.
What age did your grandchild get a smartphone? Have you had any issues with its use? Share your stories with us in the comments below.
Related links:
10 factors that influence how you grandparent
7 motivational tactics from grandkids
5 tips for disagreeing grandparents and parents