The two most inspiring women in my life
To celebrate Mother’s Day, Over60 community member Jenny Bush, 65, has shared with us the two most inspiring women she’s ever known and how they shaped her life.
The two ladies in this photo – my Mum and my Nan – have been my greatest inspiration in life. In today’s world, it seems that we so often look to the rich and famous for inspiration, and while neither of these women had fame nor fortune, what they did have has certainly impacted and shaped the life of our family for generations.
In a world where the expectation of “entitlement” and “fairness” is growing so rapidly, I believe that as a society we are losing the ability face and overcome adversity, and I am personally grateful for having been shown throughout my life how to cope with, and learn from, the difficulties of life by the amazing example set for our family by Nan and Mum.
Firstly – our Nan.
How lucky we were to be a part of her family. She lived one of the most successful lives of anyone I know… certainly not because of financial wealth, nor academic achievement. Her life never afforded her the opportunity of either of those things. Her mother died when she was two and her father gave her away to be brought up by others. Then at the age of 34 she was widowed with five children and pregnant with her sixth, so was left as a single mum – no government help in those days. Added to that, her youngest child (our mum) contracted polio which increased her burden. The medical expenses and the time pressures associated with caring for our mum throughout that time must have caused her incredible hardship as a single mum. Obviously, this must have been an extremely difficult life for the whole family, but through it all they learnt a great deal about sacrificial love and developed the ability to care for others and to individually contribute to the family well-being.
Then, later in life, one of her daughters passed away, also at age 34. She left behind three children, and when their father couldn’t handle the responsibility of raising his family alone, Nan stepped in and reared three of her grandchildren – again as a single parent.
She had every reason to play the victim because life had dealt her a tough blow, but she didn’t complain. She must have been one smart lady to manage to raise her family alone through that time, and her example certainly taught us how to face and overcome adversity. I for one am so grateful to have learnt from her. She died at the age of 93 almost 40 years ago, and she is still loved and remembered with great affection – I call that success! At the time of her death, she had six children, 21 grandchildren, over 40 great-grandchildren and five great-great-grandchildren. Obviously, those numbers have considerably expanded since then, with her family now extended to six generations (including eight sets of twins) and many of us still take great pleasure in teaching our families about “Our Nan”.
She certainly wasn’t perfect, and I recall as a teenager thinking that there were times when she was very impatient and cranky, but I still wanted to spend as much time as I could with her. I truly believe that the world could certainly benefit if there were more people around like her these days.
Secondly – our Mum.
Her experience of growing up having never known her father, and being left a “cripple” by polio, has also had a huge impact on our lives. She was determined that these setbacks were never going to stop her from enjoying life as much as she possibly could.
Early in her marriage she had four children under four – including twins – and our dad’s work meant that he was away from home from Monday to Friday, so Mum coped with the provision of all of our needs during the week. She used to pack the four of us into our twin-pram and walked the distance to our Nan’s place – because family was so important! As you can imagine, that was some feat for someone with a physical disability.
She also worked tirelessly for a local charity and always gave up her time for our sporting teams, as well as encouraging us, by example, to be involved in community groups and associated activities. Later in life she battled cancer and survived, and despite becoming wheel-chair bound in her 70s as a result of her polio, she still managed to have a very active and happy social life up until her death at age 84.
Both our Nan and our mum were extremely kind and generous people, who, regardless of their own problems, always put others first. They faced all sorts of adversity throughout their lives, but with positive attitudes they were able to overcome whatever was placed in their way. They were certainly not perfect, but they, and our aunties as well, have touched our lives incredibly. Although the measure of success today seems to be determined by financial gain, or living in the spotlight, I see these women in my life as incredible examples of success. They have left a wealth of love and memories for us to treasure which no amount of money can buy. Oh, how blessed we have been to have them in our lives.
Incidentally, I am currently in my eighth year of remission from metastatic breast cancer myself, and the examples set before me by my mum and Nan have been my inspiration to fight the battle, and to continue to live life to the fullest.