4 negative habits you really need to give up
Just like your physical health, your mental health can be greatly influenced by your everyday habits. Avoiding eating junk food should help with some weight issues; giving up cigarettes will reduce your risk of cancer; going for a brisk walk daily will combat heart disease. If we examine our mental states with the same analytic eye, there are many bad habits we are all guilty of, and they can each be adversely affecting our mental wellness. If you notice yourself doing any of these, try your best to curb the habit and reap the rewards.
1. Feeling guilty
Believe it or not, there are many different kinds of guilt, but research tells us that the only good kind of guilt is the one relating to “something harmful that you did”. This particular kind of guilt is helpful in teaching us how to be better people – how not to lie to someone, or not to intentionally hurt another, and how to make amends when we slip up. But with the good comes the bad, and there are other kinds of guilt that you should banish from your mind. These include feeling guilty for being more successful in your relationships or finances that those around you, feeling jealous of someone close to you (but not acting upon those thoughts), not doing enough to help others.
2. Not forgiving others
Many people see forgiveness as an act of selfless generosity towards someone who has wronged you. But that’s not quite right. A better way to think about forgiveness is allowing yourself to let go of the resentment you feel when you’ve been wronged, and actively choosing to move on from that feeling. It truly is an act of letting go and moving forward for the sake of yourself – not the other party. It’s helpful to remember that when you forgive someone, you’re not saying that the way the other person acted is acceptable, or that what they did doesn’t matter. It simply “allows you to be no longer hurt by them.” The act of forgiveness is credited with stress reduction, lower rates of depression, and better self-esteem.
3. Focusing on regret
Like guilt, there are different kinds of regret. This negative mental or emotional state comes from blaming oneself for a bad outcome, wishing for the power to undo a previous choice, or feeling loss for what might have been. The helpful kind of regret can help us move forward in a healthy way – moving on from behaviours that are hurtful to ourselves or others. The less healthy form comes when we have no power to change the situation. Constantly focusing on regret can release chemicals like adrenalin into your body – which can be stressful for your physical and mental health. Instead of focusing on regret, try to concentrate on the here and now. Do your best to turn a nagging regret into the good kind that helps you move forward in the best way for your own wellbeing.
4. Not feeling gratitude
Dr Andrea Bonior Ph.D. writes, “being grateful for things big and small brings big changes to your mental health.” Gratitude is the act of focusing on acknowledging and feeling thankful for the good moments you experience – no matter how small. Focusing on the interesting scenery or wonderful sunset instead of your frustration at heavy traffic can shift your focus away from negative thoughts to positive ones. Practicing gratitude is linked with lessened depression, greater heart health, and improved immune system functioning.
Do you agree? Share your thoughts in the comments below.